


Awoken me, but choking me.

by complicatednarry



Series: Awoken me. [1]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-07
Updated: 2016-02-07
Packaged: 2018-05-18 16:41:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 19,791
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5935459
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/complicatednarry/pseuds/complicatednarry
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Niall shuts the door behind Harry as he leaves and leans back against it. What the fuck was that? He’s already wondering if he made a mistake agreeing to it. But Harry’d been kind to him the other night when he didn’t need to be. Plus, he was easy on the eyes and it would be no hardship, having regular sex with him. What’s the worst that could happen?"</p><p>Well, since you asked. Niall could end up falling madly in love with a guy who's promised himself to another man, end up dedicating an entire art show to him and have everything he thought he ever knew turned upside down. Which funnily enough, is exactly what does happen.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Awoken me, but choking me.

**Author's Note:**

> The outline of this story is from a book called Some Girls Do by Clodagh Murphy. 
> 
> There were so many times throughout writing this that I almost deleted it all but I'm glad I kept on because it's been a rewarding process all in all. Just a couple things to say, firstly if you're reading this for the ziall or gryles aspects, I apologise that you'll be disappointed as they're very very much side aspects of the story, secondly I am fully aware this fic is just a notch above pwp and you should probably be warned of that before you start. 
> 
> ENJOY!!!!! :)

Niall looks around at the bar and wonders why he’s even there. Well, he knows why he’s there. Because Niamh asked and he’d do anything for Niamh. But this isn’t really his scene and these really aren’t his type of people. I mean, everyone is holding champagne flutes for fuck’s sake, there’s not pint of Guinness in sight. 

Although, Niall had caught a glimpse of Chris when he first got here, an off-and-on flame of Niall’s. Maybe Chris would end up back at Niall’s tonight. He thinks he could deal with a few glasses of champagne if it meant he got a good shag in with someone he knows and won’t expect anything in the morning. 

Niall makes his way through a group of people to the bar. He orders a drink and glances round to his left where his eyes land on a group of people who look like exactly the type of people who belong in this environment. The group is mostly made up of far too fashionable girls and two guys, one with an outrageously large quiff that he keeps messing with and one with long natural curls that fall to just above his shoulders. 

Curls has the full attention of the whole group telling some story effortlessly keeping everyone entertained. Niall’s watches him for ten seconds before deciding he finds this guy annoying and pretentious. He’s hot though, Niall thinks. And pretentiousness doesn’t really matter once this guy has Niall’s cock in his mouth. Shit, Niall’s pants go instantly tight at the thought. He can’t stop now though, and his eyes rake over this guy for the second time tonight. Good legs. Niall always appreciates a guy’s legs. He’s in danger of imagining them draped over his shoulders while he eats him out and if he’s not careful he’ll have to wank in a toilet cubicle of this bloody bar. Fuck, he really needs to go and find Chris. 

**  
A short time later, Niamh finally finds Niall.

‘There you are,’ she squeals like she’s been trying desperately to find him all night. Which Niall knows isn’t true, he’s been in the same spot all evening. 

‘Are you having fun?’ she asks, swaying a little. Niall smiles fondly, it’s her 21st she deserves to let go a little. Lord knows she works hard enough. They both work at a pub on other side of the city and they both seem to be the only ones there who work every hour God sends. Despite the fact for the both of them it’s just a way to pay the bills and they both have unrealistic dreams to achieve. Niamh is desperate to work in fashion and live the high life in London, Paris and New York. That’s what half the people here tonight already do and when Niamh isn’t pulling pints she’s going on coffee runs for most of the people in this room, as an unpaid intern just to get a glimpse of the life she wants eventually. 

‘It’s fun,’ Niall answers. 

‘Sorry, I know it’s really not your thing. But I’m glad you came.’

‘I wouldn’t miss it,’ Niall smiles. 

‘Harry!’ Niamh beams over Niall’s shoulder. ‘Niall, this is my friend Harry. He’s a photographer. Harry, this is Niall.’

Niall turns around and sees that Harry is “Curls” the pretentious guy from before that Niall wants to receive a blow job from. 

‘Hi, Niall.’

‘Hey, mate.’ They shake hands. 

‘I’m coming,’ Niamh shouts to someone Niall doesn’t know and can’t see. ‘Mind if I leave you two alone?’

‘No problem,’ Niall says not really meaning it. He figures conversation with this guy will be mildly irritating at best. 

Harry’s eyes meet Niall’s intensely. ‘What do you do?’ he asks. 

‘I’m an artist,’ Niall answers. ‘But I work at the pub with Niamh to pay the bills.’ 

‘Oh really?’ Harry looks genuinely interested. ‘What kind of art do you do?’

‘I paint,’ Niall answers in a bored voice. He doesn’t actually feel like talking about himself with this “photographer” who gets paid for his art enough that he can afford that shirt. Niall tries not to be bitter but he fails, a lot. 

‘That sounds interesting,’ Harry replies. ‘What kind of paint do you use.’

‘Oil,’ Niall answers again, monosyllabically. 

‘Right,’ Harry responds quietly. Seemingly having gotten the message. 

Niall feels guilty almost but he hates small talk and he’s shit at it anyway. 

‘You can go back to your little group over there, man.’

‘Yeah I probably will,’ Harry says flatly and turns away leaving Niall relieved. 

Niall wonders if he can leave now. He’s been here over an hour. He’s done his duty, chatted to Niamh and had two and a half drinks. He nips to the toilet and briefly gets chatting to someone he knows through Niamh on the way back until he decided it’s definitely an acceptable time to leave. His figures he should probably say goodbye to Niamh and finds her talking to curls and one of the fashionista girls he was sitting with earlier. 

‘I’m off,’ Niall mutters to her, placing his hand on the small of her back. 

‘Already?’ she pouts. 

‘Yeah I’m knackered.’

‘How are you getting home?’ she asks. 

‘I’ll walk.’

‘Niall, it’s torrential outside you can’t walk, you’ll drown.’

‘I’ll be fine.’

‘I’ll drive you,’ Harry offers. 

‘No mate, you’re alright,’ Niall says a touch on the rude side. 

‘I’ve barely drank anything, it’s no trouble. I’ve got an early shoot in the morning so I’m gonna leave too.’ 

Niall sighs. There’s really no point arguing. Beside, if he’s being honest, the thought of walking home in the rain is severely unappealing. 

‘Fine. Thanks.’

Harry kisses Niamh and the fashionista on the cheek and leads Niall out to his car. Of course it’s vintage and looks like it costs more than a house. Did this guy have to be such a cliché? 

‘So where to?’ Harry asks. 

‘I live just off Mountjoy Square,’ Niall answers with resentment in his voice. It’s not exactly the nicest part of town and no doubt Harry has never been there in his life. Probably lives in a penthouse flat right in the centre. 

‘How long you been living there?’ Harry asks and Niall wishes he wouldn’t. He’d really rather they drove in silence. 

‘Let’s not do the small talk thing the whole way.’

‘Oh. Okay.’ Niall wishes he wouldn’t do that too. His wounded tone makes Niall feels like he’s just kicked a puppy. 

‘This is me,’ Niall says some time later when they reach his building. ‘Thanks, mate see ya.’

‘Wait,’ Harry starts. ‘Do you think I could come in and take a leak?’ 

Niall inwardly groans. Shit, could this get any worse. Niall really doesn't want Harry to see where he lives but he can't really refuse to let him use his toilet after he offered to bring him home. Niall isn't ashamed of being broke, it's hard being an aspiring artist and he has nothing to be embarrassed for. But still. 

'Yeah mate, as long as you're alright leaving your shiny car unattended round here.' 

Harry looks at him. 'I'll take my chances.' 

Niall sighs. He leads Harry into the building and up the three flights of stairs to his flat. As he opens the door he reaches round the flick the light switch only to be met with continuing darkness. Shit. His electricity must have been cut off. The lights in the corridor were on so he knows it's not a power cut. 

'No electricity, sorry,'he says trying to seem nonchalant about it. 

'Why?' Harry asks and Niall wants to punch the wall. 

'I've been cut off.' 

'Oh.'

'I have a torch for when this happens. You can take it into the loo with you. It's just through there.'

'Thanks,' Harry's voice even smaller than in the car. 

Niall stands there for a few minutes dreading getting into bed and trying to sleep with no heating until he hears the bathroom door unlatch and Harry make his way back to him. 

'Look mate, just come back to mine.'

'What?' 

'You have no electricity, no heating, I'd feel shit leaving you here come on.'

The cogs turn in Niall's head for a moment. Maybe his night wouldn't end too miserably after all. 

'Alright man, let me just grab a couple things.' 

In the bedroom Niall grabs a clean t-shirt and a sweatshirt. He assumes Harry has condoms and lube but he grabs some out of his top drawer just in case. Niall's usually good at knowing when a guy's up for it but maybe he'd just been too focused on Harry irritating him that he'd missed the signs. Did he ask to come up to Niall's flat as a pretext to coming up here and getting him into bed? Niall doesn't care to think any longer, he just wants to finish his night with Harry the way he wanted to, to begin with. 

** 

They're silent most of the way back to Harry's place but the traffic has died down and doesn't take them too long. 

They arrive at Harry's building and it's nothing less than what Niall was expecting from him but he finds himself less bitter about it all now he knows how he'll be spending the remainder of his evening. 

They ride the lift together in comfortable silence and Harry leads Niall into his own flat, a far cry from Niall doing the reverse a short time before. 

'Nice place,' Niall says. 

'Thanks,' Harry replies awkwardly. 'I'm gonna make something I think. Do you want something to eat?'

Niall hopes Harry isn't asking that because he feels he has to now that he's seen his guest lives in practical poverty compared to him. But Niall is starving nonetheless. 'Yeah, that'd be great. Thanks, man.' 

He watches Harry start to busy himself in the kitchen. He wonders if Harry knows he's unabashedly checking out his arse as he watches him. God, he really has got good legs. He soon learns that Harry bites his lip when he's concentrating and Niall realises he wants to bite it himself. But he can do that later he supposes. 

'So how come I've never seen you around with Niamh before?' Harry asks. 

'Well, I've never seen you at the pub. That's probably why.' 

'You never see her out of work?' 

'Do you?' Niall finds himself snap slightly. 

'Excuse me?' Harry asks confused with Niall's tone. 

'Sorry mate. I'm just protective over Niamh. She's as tough as old boots sometimes but she's also good at letting people take advantage. Your model and fashion crowd are good at that.' 

'I'm sure they appreciate what Niamh does for them.' 

'I'm just saying. We work ourselves into the ground and then she goes off and works for them for free and spends most of her time taking coffee orders rather than seeing the inner workings of a shoot.'

'I'll let her see mine the next time I'm shooting one of them,' Harry says. 

'Oh don't do us any favours,' Niall says and he watches Harry blanch. 'Sorry, don't mind me, I'm just jealous you get to do what you love. Not all of us have been so lucky.' 

Harry nods and Niall feels guilty. He'll make it up to him in bed. If there's one thing Niall does well it's sex. And although he seems to be the uptight one in this situation Harry's looking increasingly tense as the night goes on, maybe that's why he was so determined to get Niall to come home with him tonight. Niall thinks a good fuck is exactly what Harry needs and he is more than happy to give it to him. 

'It's late and I have a shoot in the morning,' Harry starts. 'I'll show you to the spare room.'

The spare room? Harry’s obviously one of those guys who can't have casual sex in his own bed. Sacred space and all that. Not that it bothers Niall. 

He follows Harry to the room. Harry opens the door and stays in the doorway moving to the side to let Niall through. Niall takes this as his cue and pushes Harry up against the open door and pulls his face towards his. 

Their lips touch for a second as Harry's body goes rigid and then before he knows it, Niall's being shoved away. 

'What are you doing?' Harry says sharply, brows deeply furrowed. 

Niall takes a sharp intake of breath. 

'I thought. Isn't that why you brought me here?' 

'No!!' Harry almost shouts. 

'Mate, I'm so sorry, I thought you were gay. I-I'm usually good at being able to tell. Fuck.' 

'I just invited you because your electricity went out I was just trying to be nice.' 

'Yeah...yeah man I'm sorry.' 

He feels like a total prick. This guy had actually been just genuinely nice and Niall has repaid him by forcing himself on him. 

'I really am sorry,' Niall says moving towards Harry again but he flinches and won't look at him again. Niall puts his hands up. 

'I'm going to bed,' Harry mumbles. 

Niall sighs when he hears Harry's door closes and rests his head back against the wall. Well, at least Harry didn't throw him out. He'd still get a good sleep in this bed and a hot shower in the morning. Not that he deserves any of that. 

** 

When Niall wakes in the morning, he's momentarily confused by his comfortable surroundings before he remembers what happened the night before. His stomach churns remembering the look on Harry's face. 

He glances at the clock. It's just before ten. He assumes Harry will have already left for work. He'll just have a quick shower and maybe a cup of tea and he'll leave and neither of them will have to deal with each other again. 

He pads into the main living area and sees Harry sitting at the breakfast bar with a bowl of cereal. 

'Oh, morning, I thought I'd miss you,' Niall says lamely. 

'No, I'm leaving in about 20 minutes.'

'Listen, about last night. I'm sorry. I was a dick. I thought you were interested; I didn't mean to assume or take advantage.'

'It's fine, really,' Harry says and clears his throat. 'Help yourself to cereal.'

'Thanks,' Niall grabs a bowl and sits down on the stool next to Harry. He notices a picture on the fridge. A selfie, taken with an older attractive woman and a blond girl who has the same face as Harry. 

'Is that your family?' Niall asks hoping he's not being too nosy. 

'Yeah.'

'Good looking bunch.' 

Harry smiles tightly. 

'Where you from?' 

'North West of England, Cheshire. Moved here about a year ago,' Harry replies. 'How about you?' 

'Mullingar. Small town, way further out,' Niall answers. 

'You have a big family?' 

'Nah. Just me and my brother. He still lives near my parents. We don't get on.' 

‘You and your parents? Or you and your brother?’ Harry asks. 

‘Both? My dad’s cool but my mum….’ he trails off. Niall doesn't really want to talk about himself. 

'Sorry.'

Niall nods and silence falls over them again. 

'Are you working today?' Harry asks. 

'Yeah, not til later on though.'

'Do you like it?' 

'No. But it pays the bills. Most of the time.' 

'What will you do about your electricity?' 

'It'll be back on soon enough, payday isn't far.'

Harry nods uncomfortably. 

'Don't you sell your artwork?'

'Sometimes, but it's not really popular. I mean I love doing it but I've never really been told I'm any good. The only things I'm told I'm any good at are pulling pints and shagging.'

**

A few days later normal life has resumed and Niall is sitting in someone else's bed. 

The guy next to him, Tom, his name is looks very well fucked and Niall grins down at him. 

'That felt like it was a long time coming,' Tom says. 

'You felt like you were a long time coming,' Niall retorts and Tom smiles a satisfied smile. 

'I'm gonna go,' Niall announces. 

'Already? I thought we were gonna get food,' Tom replies not hiding the disappoint in his voice well at all. 

'Nah, I gotta go. I'm having dinner with my da later and I wanna paint a bit before.' 

'Will I see you tomorrow?' Tom asks and Niall rolls his eyes with his back to him. 

'No, probably not.'

'You don't give a shit do you?' Tom asks. 

'No. And neither do you remember? That's what we agreed.' 

'You're such a prick.' 

'Sorry, bro,' Niall shrugs as he pulls his jeans on. 

Niall is so fed up of guys changing their mind after a few fucks. He really needs to go back to the whole one night stand life. But he hates it. It’s nice spending the night with a warm familiar body, but still without the worry of expectation for the morning after. 

**

Niall enjoys seeing his dad. His family is a lot of work but spending time with his dad one on one is never a chore. 

‘So da, how’s business?’ Niall asks after they order their food. 

‘Oh, grand. How’s life in the art world?’

‘So-so,’ Niall answers. ‘I haven’t sold anything in a long while, though.’

‘You okay for money? That pub job paying you enough?’

‘Yeah, yeah I’m fine,’ Niall brushes him off. Their family have never lived on the breadline but they’re not wealthy by any stretch of the imagination. His mother, wouldn’t take kindly to his dad giving him money though. According to her, he checked out of those kind of privileges long ago. 

‘Well, you have that show of yours coming up in a few months. Hopefully that’ll make a turn for you,’ he says optimistically. 

‘Are you gonna come?’ Niall asks. 

‘Of course, we wouldn’t miss it.’

‘We?’ Niall asks with an unpleasant taste in his mouth. 

‘She wants to be there,’ his dad says of his mother. Niall’s not sure that’s true but he doesn’t feel having that conversation. ‘How’s it all coming along?’

‘Really well, I’m enjoying the stuff I’m doing at the moment. Just hope someone else will too.’

‘I’m sure they will.’

Niall smiles, appreciatively. 

‘We miss you at the house,’ his dad says reaching for his beer. 

‘Sorry,’ Niall replies. He never knows what to say. It’s been the same thing for years. His mum absolutely can’t come to terms with Niall’s refusal to “make something of himself” and she pretends his sexuality doesn’t even exist. Which is more than can be said for his brother, who has barely looked Niall in the eye since he came out. Homophobic wanker. He’s thankful his dad is more of a what-you-see-is-what-you-get kind of guy. 

Niall feels bad that his dad gets shut out a bit by him because he can’t get on with his mother or his brother, Greg. 

‘Will you come back for my birthday?’ 

Niall’s stomach turns. 

‘I mean, you know I hate that kind of thing but it is a big one and your mother’s gone to town with the planning. I’d really love it if you came across and stayed a couple of nights.’

‘I’ll be there,’ Niall says bravely, not wanting to disappoint him. 

‘Great!’ His dad grins. ‘Will you bring someone with you?’ 

Niall wants to bark out a laugh at the outrageous suggestion. His mother would have a nervous breakdown trying to explain that to her conservative friends and Greg would have a field day with it.

‘No, I’ll come on my own,’ Niall replies. 

**

The next evening it’s Niall’s night off and he figures he’ll spend it trying to get some work in. He’s been feeling relatively uninspired recently. He’s well and truly in the zone when the buzzer by his door sounds. Odd, he never gets visitors unless it’s Niamh but he knows she’s working tonight. 

‘Hello?’ Niall presses the button. 

‘Hi, um. It’s Harry.’ Pause. ‘The guy from the—the other night.’

Silence. Niall frowns at the speaker in front of his face in confusion. 

‘What do you want?’ 

‘Um, can I come up?’ 

‘Okay?’ Niall answers like he’s asking a question himself. 

He waits for Harry to make his way up the stairs and opens his door to let him in. When Harry steps inside the flat he notices Niall’s stuff all over. 

‘Oh sorry, were you working?’ 

‘Yeah, just a bit of something. It’s fine though, you’re not interrupting.’

Harry nods and gulps. Niall surveys him. What the fuck is this guy doing here?

‘So, did you want something?’ 

‘Yeah,’ Harry replies and shifts awkwardly. ‘I wanted to um—ask you something---um talk to you about..something.’

‘Okay.’

‘A favour, actually,’ Harry says. ‘One maybe you’ll benefit from too. I hope. Maybe.’

‘Let’s hear it then,’ Niall replies. His intrigue peaked. 

‘Remember the other night, at my flat. When you…kissed me?’ Harry whispers the last bit and Niall chuckles before remembering what a fool he’d made of himself that night. 

‘Yeah, I’m really sorry about that, again.’ Niall says. ‘I thought, you’d accepted my apology.’

‘Oh, I have, it’s just…I’ve kind of changed my mind.’

Changed his mind? Oh. 

‘Are you just over here cause you’re horny and want sex?’ Niall laughs, shocked. 

‘No!’ Harry jumps. 

‘Well then, I’m lost mate.’

‘The other night, when I said no and you said you thought I was gay,’ Harry takes a breath. ‘Well, you weren’t wrong but you weren’t exactly right either.’ 

Niall’s all ears. 

‘There is this guy. But there hasn’t been one before. It’s kind of new, for me.’

‘Right…’ Niall is lost again. He’s not sure why Harry has come over to his flat to explain that he might be interested in men because there’s a guy in the picture that isn’t Niall. What the fuck. 

‘Mate you’re gonna have to be a little clearer, what exactly are you doing here?’

‘I want you to teach me stuff,’ Harry blurts out. 

‘Stuff?’ 

‘Sex stuff,’ Harry replies with pink cheeks. ‘Gay sex stuff,’ he clarifies. 

‘You want me to teach you how to fuck a guy?’ 

‘Well yes,’ Harry answers, eyes darting all over the place. 

When Niall doesn’t reply straight away, Harry starts babbling. 

‘I mean, I’m no virgin. I like sex, and I’m good at it. I know how to make a girl scream…’ He trails off when Niall makes a disgruntled face. ‘Sorry.’

‘It’s fine. Just not really interested in how you make girls scream.’

Harry nods embarrassed. He’s actually kinda fucking cute and Niall’s knows he wants Harry but he’s still way too confused as to what he’s actually asking him. 

‘Okay, you’re gonna have to start from the beginning. Who is this guy?’ 

‘He’s a guy I met through work. He’s a designer. He was at Niamh’s party the other night with me, you might have seen him.’

Niall racks his brain. ‘Quiff guy?’ 

‘Yeah, that’s him. His name’s Nick.’

‘Right.’

‘Well, we’ve become kind of close. Had a few drunken snogs and he gave me wank in the cab on the way home the other week. I’m kinda starting to have a thing for him. But the thing is, he’s like super experienced. He’s older than us and I just don’t wanna be an innocent virgin. He’s already ruthless when it comes to taking the piss and I just kinda wanna impress him.’

Niall takes in what Harry’s saying. 

‘It’s stupid, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have come,’ Harry babbles. 

‘Wait, no. I’m not saying no.’

‘You’re not?’

‘I’m not saying yes either,’ Niall warns. ‘I’m still not exactly sure what you want from me?’

‘Just teach me things as we go along.’

‘Things?’ 

‘You know, blowjobs, handjobs, sex,’ Niall scoffs laughing and Harry grins. ‘Shut up, I know it sounds stupid but receiving them doesn’t exactly give you the skill to give them. Plus, you’ll get something out of it too.’

‘Oh I will, will I?’

‘You’ll get casual sex. No strings attached. With me.’

‘You flatter yourself don’t you? You think I’m short of sex?’

‘I didn’t say that. But I know you like casual sex and most guys you fuck don’t understand it.’

‘For fuck’s sake. You been doing your research? Talking to Niamh?’ 

Harry has the good grace to look slightly ashamed. ‘I just didn’t want to completely ambush you.’

‘Okay.’ 

‘Okay?’ Harry looks relieved. ‘You’ll do it?’ 

‘I’ll do it. I like sex, and I could do a lot worse than regular sex with you. Even if it is shit to begin with.’

Harry barks out a laugh. ‘Well, thank you.’

‘So when do you wanna start?’ 

‘When’s your next night off from work?’ Harry asks. 

‘Tuesday.’

‘I can do Tuesday. You wanna come here or me come to yours?’ 

‘I don’t mind. You come to me I guess, if you want.’

‘Probably be more comfortable,’ Niall agrees.

‘See you Tuesday then.’

‘Yeah, see you Tuesday man.’

Niall shuts the door behind Harry he leaves and leans back against it. What the fuck was that? He’s already wondering if he made a mistake agreeing to it. But Harry’d been kind to him the other night when he didn’t need to be. Plus, he was easy on the eyes and it would be no hardship, having regular sex with him. What’s the worst that could happen?

**

On Tuesday, Niall spends most of his day off trying to paint but keeps an eye on the clock to make sure he leaves enough time to get ready and be at Harry’s on time. 

‘Hey,’ Harry breathes as he opens the door slightly too quickly. He’s obviously been waiting. 

‘Would you like a beer?’ Harry asks. 

‘Yeah, sure, thanks.’

Harry almost chugs his own beer. 

‘Relax mate, slow down.’

‘Sorry, I’m a bit nervous,’ Harry admits and Niall thinks again how cute Harry can be. 

‘You really shouldn’t be, man. Let’s just have fun with it.’

‘Yeah you’re right. Sorry, just overthinking it I guess.’

‘You call the shots, man we’ll just do what you want. Have you thought about what you wanna do?’ Niall asks. 

‘Well, yeah, like I said the other day..’

‘No,’ Niall cuts Harry off. ‘I mean, like, what are your limits? How far do you wanna go?’

Harry looks confused. ‘Well I mean, like I was we’d do it all..?’

Niall sighs. ‘I mean do you wanna fuck me or do you wanna be fucked?’

‘Oh,’ Harry eyes widen marginally. ‘I guess I wanna fuck you?’ 

‘That’s cool.’

‘Do you like that?’ 

Niall laughs and Harry’s cheeks pink and then Niall feels guilty. Harry came to him because he feels he can trust Niall and avoid being made fun of and here Niall is laughing at him. 

‘I’m sorry,’ Niall says. ‘Yes, I like that. I like that a lot. But if you ever wanna switch it up. We can. It’s up to you, we’ll take it as we go.’

Harry smiles looking comforted and Niall suddenly feels protective over this guy who he barely knows but has trusted part of his life with Niall. He presumes Harry thought he was straight until fairly recently and Niall knows that Harry must be in weird state of mind. 

‘Do you wanna go to the bedroom?’ Niall asks him and he nods. 

They walk to the bedroom. ‘So where do you want me?’

‘Relax, this bit’s not that different,’ Niall leans up and kisses Harry, who’s a little taller than him which has always been a turn on for Niall. Fuck, this was actually a really good idea that Harry had. 

He feels Harry relax into the kiss. 

‘A couple of ground rules before we start,’ Niall tells Harry. 

‘Okay.’

‘If you don’t like something we do, you tell me and we stop. No faking,’ Niall tells him sternly. 

‘Okay,’ Harry agrees. 

‘I’ll be able to tell if you’re faking,’ he warns. 

‘I won’t. Promise.’

‘Good,’ Niall says and he slips his hands under Harry’s shirt, running his hands along his soft stomach. ‘And second, I want you to be vocal. Tell me what you want, what you like. I don’t want you to be bored. Plus, I like talking during sex,’ Niall grins wickedly and Harry whimpers under his breath. Good start, Niall thinks. 

They start to undress while they kiss and Niall can’t help himself and gets his hand into Harry’s pants. Fuck. Fuck, he’s big. Niall’s bites his lip as he goes hot all over, he thinks about Harry inside him and suddenly he doesn’t feel like the one in control anymore. 

‘Can I see you?’ Niall asks and Harry whimpers and nods. 

He pushes Harry’s briefs down and lets himself sneak a good eyeful. 

‘Fuck, I gotta suck you off,’ Harry bites his lip and nods his head as Niall pushes him down on the bed. 

He kisses down Harry’s chest, revels in swiping his tongue down his stomach. He jerks as Niall wraps his mouth around him and tries to suck him down as far as he can, using his hand for the rest. He pulls off and continues wanking Harry with his left hand while he begins kissing the inside of Harry’s thighs. 

‘Pass me one of those pillows,’ Niall asks huskly and Harry reaches up blindly and hands one to him. 

‘Lift your hips,’ he commands and Harry obeys putting his weight down on the pillow after Niall slots it underneath him. 

Niall resumes running his tongue along the inside of Harry’s thighs. 

‘Oh…. NO!’ Harry exclaims when he realises what Niall has next in mind. ‘You don’t have to do that.’

‘You don’t like that?’

‘No….I mean I’m sure it’s great. But you don’t have to do it, you’re supposed to be teaching me how to do stuff to you.’

‘Getting you to relax and getting you used to stuff like this is part of your training,’ Niall grins. ‘Plus, it’ll feel better to be opened up this way, I promise.’

Harry looks up at him with uncertainty. 

‘Trust me, I love doing this,’ Niall tells him. ‘Besides, been thinking about eating you out since I first saw you at Niamh’s party.’

‘Really?’ Harry squeaks. 

‘Yeah,’ Niall breathes and decides he can’t wait any longer. ‘Did you buy some lube?’ 

Harry’s eye fly open. 

‘But I thought I was….to you.’ 

Niall chuckles. ‘So eager. There’s plenty of time. Let’s just focus on you for the minute. You need to learn what you like and what you want with a guy as well as what they want. I’m not gonna fuck you, I’d just like to have a bit of a play if that’s alright. Finger you a bit around my tongue if you’re okay with that?’

‘Okay,’ Harry whispers, a flush spreading down his chest. 

‘We’ll need lube for that though.’ 

‘Top drawer,’ Harry points and Niall goes over to fish it out. 

Niall’s back quickly and drizzles lubes all over his fingers to circles round Harry’s hole, nowhere near threatening to push in but the possibility is there all the same. 

‘Niall,’ Harry whines.

‘What, gorgeous? What do you want?’

‘You said—your tongue…’

Niall grins and pushes Harry’s thighs further open lowering his mouth until he can put his tongue against Harry’s hole perfectly. 

‘Fuck,’ Harry moans and it spurs Niall on fucking him with his tongue until he feels Harry completely give into the feeling, relaxing enough so that can creep one finger in before Harry tenses up again. 

‘Breathe,’ Niall tells him and he takes a shaky breath in but it doesn’t do much. Niall lowers his mouth back down to Harry’s cock and tongues at his slit, which does the trick where Harry feels good enough for a second to allow Niall’s finger inside him. 

‘Fuck,’ Harry laughs breathily. ‘You’re not playing fair.’

Niall chuckles and encourages Harry to push his hips down a little onto Niall’s fingers. It helps Harry a lot and before long, two of Niall’s fingers are inside him and his thighs are starting to shake. 

Niall rubs his fingers against Harry’s prostate but it’s not fair on his first time (or his tenth time even) to make him try and come from just that, even if Harry is seemingly squirming in pleasure. Niall decides to put him out of misery and wraps his mouth around him again while his fingers continue and before long Harry’s coming in spurts against Niall’s mouth. 

He wipes his mouth and travels up to Harry so he’s practically crowding over him. Niall peers down at him and Harry makes eye contact looking like he’s floating in bliss. Niall reaches down to kiss him and lets Harry taste himself. 

‘God, I love my new job,’ Niall jokes as he pulls away and Harry barks out a laugh and grins up at him in delight. Fuck, he’s cute. 

‘You okay?’ Niall asks when Harry remains quiet. 

‘Yeah, can you just…’ Harry scrambles a little to get arms around Niall’s middle and pull him down so Harry’s is wrapped up in him side by side on the bed. 

‘I’m a cuddler,’ he whispers into Niall’s chest and that doesn’t surprise Niall at all. Even without Harry being physically affectionate after sex, it was an intense orgasm and Harry is still shaking a little, it makes sense he wants to be held. 

‘Well, I think we’ve found one thing you like,’ Niall says. 

‘Yeah, I guess that was okay,’ Harry grins and Niall laughs. 

The moment’s over when Harry shifts slightly and realises how hard Niall is. 

Harry’s eyes widen as if he’d forgotten that Niall needs to get off too. 

‘Mind if I just have a wank?’ he asks. 

‘What? No…let me,’ Harry says reaches for him. 

‘I will, but maybe not tonight. Let’s start off slow.’

‘Okay,’ Harry replies quietly. ‘If you’re sure.’

Of course, it doesn’t quite work out. As soon as Niall gets halfway to close, Harry gets impatient with no touching and it ends up being a kind of two person handjob where Niall’s getting himself off while Harry has an experimental feel with wide eyes. For a moment Niall thinks that Harry is playing up to the whole inexperienced thing but he supposes if he was here now with a naked girl he’d have no idea what to do. Maybe it’s the same thing. 

Some time later, long after Harry’s fallen asleep in his arms, he gently extricates himself from the bed and quietly gets dressed. He assumes Harry will ring him soon when he wants to make the next date. 

**

The following afternoon Niall’s halfway through his shift when Niamh’s starting hers. 

‘Hiya babe,’ she says as she joins him behind the bar. 

‘You alright?’ he greets. 

‘Yikes, somebody got lucky recently,’ she grins and wiggles her eyebrows. ‘Who’s the lucky guy?’ 

‘How can you always tell?’ he replies, his voice a notch higher than usual.

‘It’s a gift. My sixth sense,’ she replies. ‘Come on then, who is he?’

‘None of your fecking business, that’s who.’

She rolls her eyes. ‘Yeah yeah, whatever I’ll find out eventually.’

‘Go clear some tables,’ he slaps her playfully on her thigh with a teatowel and she squeals.

**

Later in the evening, shortly after he arrives back home after his shift, his buzzer sounds.

He opens the door to Harry, not expecting the stoney face he’s met with. 

‘You alright, mate?’ 

‘You just left me in bed last night without saying goodbye.’ 

Niall scoffs. ‘Sorry man.’

‘Don’t do that again,’ Harry says sternly and Niall tries not to snigger. ‘That’s one of my ground rules.’

‘Okay,’ Niall chuckles. 

‘Okay.’

‘Sorry,’ Niall says lamely before Harry grabs his face and kisses him with purpose. 

‘You’re forgiven,’ Harry grins. ‘You can make it up to me with lesson number two.’

Niall scoffs as Harry leads him the short walk to Niall’s bed. They kiss until they’ve awakened each other’s senses and every nerve-end in Niall’s body is tingling. 

‘I wanna fuck you,’ Harry says breathy, voice deep with desire. ‘I wanna know how to make you feel good.’

Niall chuckles as Harry claws mindlessly at his clothes frantic to feel Niall’s naked skin against his. 

‘Don’t laugh at me,’ Harry mumbles, undoing Niall’s jeans. 

‘I’m sorry, I’m not,’ Niall replies. ‘I appreciate the enthusiasm.’ 

Niall lifts his arms up as Harry pulls off his shirt and then does the same with his own. Harry takes initiative and lowers his mouth to Niall’s neck kissing and licking down to the hollow of his throat and down to his chest. 

‘Can I?’ Harry looks up and Niall motioning his hand to the opened button of Niall’s jeans. 

Niall nods and Harry wastes no time in dipping his hand into his pants, making Niall hiss, before pulling down his briefs. 

Harry spends a few moments concentrating a little too hard and wanking Niall until he feels Niall’s hands against his bicep signalling him to stop. 

‘Am I doing it wrong?’ Harry stops. 

‘No, it’s great. Shall we move it along though?’ 

Harry smiles a little embarrassed and nods. 

‘Lube’s in there,’ Niall points and Harry gulps as he lifts himself of the bed to fetch it. 

He drizzles the lube over his fingers with shaky breaths. 

‘Relax,’ Niall says touching Harry’s bicep encouragingly. ‘We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.’ 

‘I want to. I just don’t want to do it wrong.’ 

Niall smiles fondly, butterflies swarming a little in his stomach. 

‘That’s why we need to do this because I don’t wanna be pathetic and nervous like this with Nick.’

The butterflies come to a sudden stop and Niall has to swallow down the taste of bitterness in his mouth. For a second he’d forgotten, he’s in the equivalent of a sexual business arrangement with Harry. He’s the test dummy. Nothing more.

‘You’re not pathetic, just,’ he grabs Harry’s hand and guides him to where he needs to be. 

Harry seems to have feel around first with wide eyes and Niall chuckles. 

Niall loves this part before sex and he guides Harry through just the way he likes. Harry’s clearly very wary and Niall does his best to make sure he knows it feels good. 

‘Just—just crook your finger a little, like..’ 

‘Like that?’

Niall groans. ‘Ye—es, yes like that.’

Harry releases a breath in relief. 

‘Fuck, fuck…if you keep it up like that I’m gonna come.’

Harry doesn’t let up. 

‘Mate, seriously.’

His hand stills. ‘You don’t wanna come like this?’

‘Nah, I want your cock.’

‘Oh,’ Harry chokes and pulls his hand from Niall slightly too roughly for his liking. 

Niall rolls the condom on Harry while he watches and he lubes up sufficiently giving Harry a few tugs until Harry can’t wait any longer to be inside him. Niall chuckles at his eagerness, not really sure why considering he’s the one almost shaking with the need to have Harry inside him. He’s so big. Probably one of the biggest guys he’s ever been with. 

‘Do you want to…?’ Harry motions for Niall to turn over. 

‘Nah, I like it on my back.’

Harry leans forward and places his hands either side of Niall’s chest as he lines himself up teasing at his hole. 

He pushes in slowly, almost too carefully and Niall’s desperate to grabs his arse and pull him in as deep and fast as possible but he doesn’t want to overwhelm him. 

‘Fuck, fuck, it’s so tight,’ Harry chants through short breaths. ‘Does that—does it feel good?’

‘Yeah, yeah it feels good.’

Harry moans as he pushes in deeper and surer. 

‘God, mate, you’re so big.’

‘Yeah? Do you like it?’

Niall scoffs. What kind of question is that. ‘Of course I fucking like it, you idiot. Faster.’

Harry grins and picks up the pace. He takes the initiative and hooks his arm under Niall’s knee to change the position and hits his prostate perfectly on the first try. 

‘Oh, fuck, just like that. Right there. Don’t you fucking dare move.’

‘Can I kiss you?’ Harry asks biting his lip. 

Normally Niall doesn’t really kiss during sex. He likes a bit to start off foreplay but that tends to be it. Still, he finds himself nodding almost eagerly. 

They kiss sloppily for a while groaning into each other’s mouths, Harry crowding over Niall.

Harry falters a little as Niall clenches around him but he can tell he tries his best to keep the pace and angle the same as Niall slowly falls apart beneath him. 

‘I don’t think I can last much longer,’ Harry admits breathlessly and Niall opens his eyes to see a mixture of embarrassment and worry on his face. 

‘It’s okay, just come. We can work on your stamina another time.’

Harry hesitates. ‘It’s okay, honestly, just come…baby.’ He lets go the minute the endearment slips out of Niall’s mouth and groans loudly before collapsing in a heap on top of him. God Niall hasn’t used that word in a long time. There’s just something about Harry’s uncertainty and eagerness that totally endears him. 

Niall lets them lie together for a few moments, running his fingers up and down Harry’s spine while he gets his breath back, before saying, ‘as lovely as this is, I kinda still gotta get off, mate.’

Harry protests jokily but grins as he encases Niall’s cock in his rough palm and finishes him off perfectly.

‘You enjoy that?’ Niall asks as he peeks at Harry who’s already on the verge of his post orgasm coma.

‘Mhm,’ Harry murmurs smiling sleepily.

Niall didn’t assume Harry would stay over with him in his crappy bed in his dingy flat but he falls asleep in Niall’s arms fairly quickly and Niall’s not stupid enough to not take advantage. He runs his fingers through Harry’s hair and enjoys the way he sighs happily in his sleep, before he falls into his own slumber. 

**

They don’t get to see much of each other over the next couple of weeks. Niall’s snowed under trying to get things ready for his solo art show. He’s been failing miserably at putting anything together that he’d be proud enough to display at the show. 

Just as he’s quite literally staring at a blank canvas he hears his phone vibrate. It’s a text from Harry.

-Can’t wait to see you tonight. Xx-

Niall rolls his eyes. He’s so soft. He would never have thought that of Harry when he first met him. It was clear straight away that he’s funny, smart, fucking gorgeous and he knows it. And kind too, of course, what with offering Niall his place for night, wanting nothing in return. At that point anyway. But he’s actually very soft, a hopeless romantic, completely needy. Niall’s just glad he has the comfort of knowing there’s this poor sod Nick who’ll have to deal with it all at some point. Still, it doesn’t stop that warm satisfying feeling run through Niall when he considers that Harry is currently thinking about him and wanting to be with him. 

Niall shakes that feeling away and picks up a paint brush. Let’s see if he can get anything, just one thing done that might be worth putting on at this damn show. 

He plays around with no specific idea, just letting his fingers take the reins. This is how he used to paint, it’s how he got into it in the first place, just shutting his mind off and allowing his subconscious to overtake. 

He tends to stick to places more than people but today it seems his inspiration has come from elsewhere. He starts with the jawline and runs into shading the hair. He gets so lost in it that it takes him almost two hours to take a breather and step back to look at the progress. Holy shit, it’s Harry. It’s his side profile. Niall’s drawn his hair in a bun like he wears sometimes, his eyes are closed and he’s not sure he’s got the nose right but there’s no mistaking it’s Harry. 

He convinces himself it makes sense. He’s been seeing a lot of Harry, it’s not completely crazy that he’s taking up a big part of his mind. Still, it freaks him out enough to stop for the day. 

**

Later that evening, Harry turns up with a Chinese takeaway. Their evening, starts off as it usually does but Niall notices Harry getting quieter as the night goes on. 

‘You okay?’ Niall asks curious.

Harry looks over at him and swallows. 

‘Do you wanna um….’ Niall patiently waits for Harry to finish. ‘Do it differently tonight?’

‘Differently how?’

Harry’s eyes just widen as if Niall’s should know exactly what he means. Niall just cocks his head inquisitively.

Harry releases a breath. ‘Do you wanna fuck me tonight?’

Oh boy, that was the wrong time to take a sip of beer. Niall splutters. 

‘Okay—I’ll take that as a bad sign.’

‘Um—no—no I want that. Jesus Christ Harry, I wanna fuck you,’ Niall rambles and it shocks him almost as much as it shocks Harry. Does he? He usually always opts for being fucked, never really feels like he’s missing out for not switching up all that often. He certainly hadn’t realised how badly he wants to switch it up with Harry, until he just said the words out loud to him now. 

‘Yeah?’

‘Yeah,’ Niall clears his throat. ‘Although, I didn’t think that um—was on the syllabus.’

Harry laughs. ‘I’ve um—yeah I’ve just sort of been thinking about it.’

‘With me?’ Niall asks. He’s not sure he wants to fulfill Harry’s fantasies if Nick’s the one Harry’s been thinking about doing this with. 

‘Of course, you,’ Harry says as if there couldn’t be anyone else in the picture. ‘You’re the one I’m sleeping with currently.’

‘Okay.’

They stare at each other for a moment, Harry fidgeting with his hands. 

‘So, bedroom?’ Niall asks making the first move and Harry nods. 

They start off on usual ground. Niall sucks Harry off until he’s relaxed enough to let Niall push two slicked fingers inside him. 

Harry’s loud and Niall loves that. He’s always loud when he gets fingered but tonight he’s especially loud. Maybe it’s because he knows what’s ahead. It makes Niall hot all over to think about how loud he’ll be when he’s inside him. 

Niall rubs the tips of his fingers for a little while with Harry squirming and gasping until he asks if he’s ready. 

‘Think you should probably turn over. It’s easier on your front the first time. That okay?’ he asks, his hand rubbing delicately over Harry’s abdomen. 

Harry nods and turns over.

‘You alright?’ Niall asks him as he rolls the condom on. 

‘Mhm,’ Harry replies, his head turned to the side watching him. 

‘It’s—it’s gonna hurt, but I’ll go really slow, I promise. Tell me if you wanna stop at any point.’ God, Niall is nervous, he’s almost shaking as he lines up. He tries to think if he’s ever been with a first-timer before. He doesn’t think he has. 

He presses in excruciatingly slowly and Harry whimpers. He places his hand supportively on Harry’s lower back. 

‘You alright?’

‘Yeah, m—move please,’ Harry grits out. 

‘Oh fuck,’ Niall groans as he starts setting a pace. 

‘Can you—can…’ 

‘What baby? What do you want?’ 

Harry scrambles his hands around reaching for Niall’s back and then he understands. He shifts his legs slightly so he can easily press his chest against Harry’s back and manages to set a deep rhythm that has Harry groaning and gripping the bedsheets. Niall places his hands over his and kisses the back of his neck. 

'You're doing so good, baby. You feel fucking perfect.' 

He does, too. Niall can't ever remember it feeling this good before. In fact, it's so good he thinks it may be over embarrassingly fast. 

He moves himself up a little so his elbows are resting either side of Harry's shoulders and Niall fucks into him like that, Harry's moans grow louder and louder until Niall knows he needs more, slipping his arm under Harry’s torso and pulling him up onto his knees. 

'Fuu-uck, Niall, that's so...so deep, it's to-oo much.'

'Too much? Do you need me to..?' Niall makes to pull out a little. 

'Don't you fucking dare,' Harry groans and Niall chuckles reaching for his cock. 

He wanks him clumsily for a few seconds before he comes with a long groan. 

'Can I keep going?' Niall asks rubbing Harry's back. 

'Mhm,' Harry whimpers, head hanging. 

It only takes a few hard and fast pushes in before Niall comes with a grunt. 

Harry hisses as he pulls out and he quickly gets rid of the condom before grabbing a flannel. 

'You okay gorgeous?' Niall whispers as he cleans Harry up and he turns back around to look up at him with a fucked out grin. 

'Was that alright?' Niall murmurs. 

Harry snorts in response. 'Yeah, it was alright. Nothing to write home about.' 

Niall pinches Harry's side and he yelps. 

'Heeey,' Harry whines and reaches his arms out. 'Cuddle.' 

Niall rolls his eyes but happily bundles Harry in his arms, kissing his sweaty forehead and running his fingertips lightly over his back. 

‘What was your first time like?’ Harry asks sleepily. 

‘It was okay,’ Niall answers. ‘Was with an older guy when I was seventeen. I rode my bike over to his place and we fucked. It was a wham-bam-thank you mam kind of situation but he took care of me. I just wanted to get it over with.’ 

Harry wriggles up in Niall’s arms and kisses him deep and languidly. ‘Thank you.’

‘For what?’ 

‘For making mine so good,’ he hums happily. 

Niall smiles. He can’t remember the last time he felt this content. 

**

Niall spends most of the next Saturday perfecting the shading around the tattoos on Harry’s chest. He’s managed to compartmentalise the whole crisis in his head about why the only inspiration that seems to be coming out of his fingers is Harry. 

His phone buzzes as a text from Niamh comes through. 

-Tickets will be waiting for you on the door tonight. See u there xx-

He stares at the screen in confusion for a few moments. Oh! He told Niamh he’d go to a gig tonight. One of her friends’ band is playing. Shit, he told Harry they could spend some time together tonight. Maybe they can go together. Would Harry even want that? They’ve not really spent any time together outside of their respective apartments since this whole thing started. He tries ringing Harry but there’s no answer. 

An hour later though, Harry turns up at his door. 

‘Hey,’ Niall greets him. ‘Did you not get my text?’

‘No, sorry. I’ve barely checked my phone today. Is everything okay?’

‘Yeah it’s fine, it’s just that—a friend of Niamh’s is playing a gig tonight and Niamh said she’d got me tickets ages ago and I completely forgot. But it’s tonight.’

‘Oh. So you’re cancelling on me?’ Harry’s not even trying to hide his disappointment. 

‘No, just a change of plans. You can come with me. I mean, if you’re interested?’

‘Yeah?’ Harry grins brightening up considerably. 

‘Yeah, if you don’t mind being seen out with me.’ Niall teases and Harry laughs. ‘I thought maybe we could……’

‘What?’ Harry asks looking up intrigued. 

‘We could—make it part of your training.’

‘How so?’

‘You ever had PDA with a guy before?’

‘No, but I’m not like ashamed or embarrassed about that,’ Harry assures him. ‘You know that right?’

‘Course, yeah but it’s still something to get used to,’ Niall tries to sound casual. He knows he’s being a greedy bastard but he also knows he doesn’t get many chances to go out with a guy like Harry to show off too often and he wants to take advantage. 

‘What, so I’m gonna be like your boyfriend for the evening?’ Harry grins. 

‘If you want.’

‘Okay, boyfriend. Let’s do it,’ Harry kisses him loudly on the mouth. Niall definitely wants. 

**

The venue’s heaving when they get there and Harry wastes no time in slipping his hand in Niall’s. He leads them through the crowd and he ends up seeing far more familiar faces than he thought he would. He never lets up his tight grip on Harry’s hand and proudly introduces him to everyone they bump into. 

It doesn’t escape Niall that there are more than a few wandering, hungry eyes over Harry and it takes every ounce of strength that Niall has, to stop himself from snogging the face off him in front of everyone, reminding them who Harry’s here with. It gives him a feeling of serious pride being here with him and Niall knows that’s dangerous. Of course, a lot of those hungry looks were joined by looks from people that Niall vaguely knows assessing their entwined fingers with intrigue. 

They get to the bar and order some beers before they find a spot on the floor. As they watch the show, they struggle to keep their hands off each other and Niall secretly hopes Harry isn’t just doing it because Niall suggested it be part of his training. 

‘Do you want another drink?’ Niall shouts over the music and Harry nods in reply before momentarily resting his head against his shoulder and kissing his neck. For all the world to see Harry as the seemingly adoring boyfriend. 

On his way to the bar, Niall glances back at Harry and watches him. He’s doing nothing in particular, just nodding his head rhythmically to the music and biting his lip absentmindedly. God, he’s hot. Niall wonders if he knows how hot he really is. He’s certain that every other person in this place knows exactly how much, as he watches one girl in particular rake her eyes over him hungrily from a few feet away.

He takes their drinks back over and Harry greets him with a kiss and settles him back closely against Niall while they watch the rest of the show. Niall ignores how good it feels when he notices the girl with the wandering eyes looking fed up at the sight of them together. 

‘There you are!!’ Niamh shrieks as she finds Niall after the band finish. ‘How long have you been here? Why didn’t you come say hi? Oh hi Harry, I didn’t know you were coming.’

She stops her babbling as she notices him tucked into Niall’s side. 

‘Oh,’ she says eyes widening. 

Niall hopes Niamh finding them won’t scare Harry, since Niamh has a direct link to Nick and that whole group of fashionistas. A side of Niamh’s life that Niall likes to purposefully forget exists, and recently he’s been doing the same with Harry. 

Niamh looks at Niall with a look that he knows means they’ll be talking about this later in excruciating detail until her face turns back to normal and she tells them both to enjoy their evening before disappearing back into the crowd. 

‘You okay?’ Niall asks him. 

‘Yep,’ Harry smiles and kisses Niall. ‘I wanna get off.’ 

‘Was it something Niamh said?’ Niall chuckles into Harry’s mouth surprised. 

‘Here. I need to get off here.’ 

‘Right here?’ 

‘Bathroom.’ 

‘Fuck,’ Niall mutters under his breath as Harry starts to drag them in the direction of the bathroom. 

‘Mm, got you alone at last,’ Harry whispers as he pulls Niall into the end cubicle. 

Niall hears him sigh as he begins to kiss down his neck and unzip his jeans. 

‘Hard already?’ Niall whispers lowly in his ear and Harry hums.

‘I got half-hard just looking at you tonight,’ Harry admits followed by a hiss as Niall thumbs his foreskin back and pushes him through his hand using the precome to allow his hand to glide easily down his length. God, Harry has such a perfect cock it makes Niall’s head hazy with want. 

He doesn’t last long and spurts the second Niall sucks at his earlobe and commands him to come all over his hand. His head bangs back against the door as his mouth opens in a silent moan, one fist clenching in the bottom of Niall’s shirt. 

Niall’s sure watching Harry come like this is the hottest thing he’s ever seen and it takes everything in him not to demand Harry bends over this instant. 

‘Class 101 in bathroom handjobs complete,’ Niall jokes. 

They clean themselves up and make their way back out. They see Niamh chatting to the band, with a few other people Niall recognises and they decide to have one more drink before leaving. 

‘Another beer?’ Niall asks and Harry nods before making his way over to where Niamh is sitting with the band. 

‘Hey, you,’ Niall hears a soft voice close behind him and turns around smiling. He’d know that voice anywhere. 

‘Well, well, long time no see,’ Niall grins as he takes Zayn in. God, he’s every bit as beautiful as ever, and then some. ‘Wow, miss me that much you had to copy my hairstyle.’

‘Fuck off,’ Zayn says grinning as he puts his hands either side of Niall’s neck and gives him a quick kiss. ‘How’ve you been?’ 

They’ve been sleeping together on and off for the last few years. Met at an art show and, despite being an unlikely match, hit it off straight away. Both struggling artists and both into the casual thing, they just fell in with each other. It’s still some of the best sex Niall’s ever had. They go months without seeing or talking to each other and then out of the blue, they’ll find each other again. 

‘I’ve been good man, you?’ 

‘Yeah, pretty good, thanks. Business good?’ Zayn asks meaning Niall’s art. 

‘Not bad,’ Niall breathes. ‘I’ve been dabbling in some—stuff I don’t usually but it’s been…good. I got a show coming up soon.’

‘Nice, text me and I’ll come down,’ Zayn smiles, eyes lighting up with excitement for Niall. He’s always loved that about Zayn, there’s never any agenda between the two of them. Total mutual respect. 

‘You got plans for the rest of the night? It’d be nice to catch up,’ Zayn says, his voice slightly lower now with implications Niall recognises. 

Niall breathes in deep. He looks over at Harry, surprised when he’s met with a hard gaze straight back from him, across the room, putting him slightly at unease.

He quickly turns his eyes back to Zayn. ‘I can’t. I’m kind of—here with someone.’

‘Ah,’ Zayn nods. ‘Well, man I’m happy for you. No hard feelings, I’m kinda seeing this model anyway, been getting her to pose for me,’ he adds winking. 

Niall chuckles good-naturedly. ‘Course you have.’

‘It was great seeing you anyway,’ he says as he begins to walk away. ‘Text me about the show, I’ll be there.’ 

He makes his way table and places Harry’s drink down in front of him before sitting down and noticing Harry’s jaw set in a tight lock. 

‘What’s up?’ Niall murmurs making Harry look at him for a moment before standing up and walking away. 

Niall looks at Niamh confused. ‘What happened?’ he mouths at her and she shrugs. 

He finds Harry standing on the pavement outside waiting for a cab. 

‘What the hell was that about?’ Niall asks as he gets to him. 

‘Funny I was gonna ask you the same question,’ Harry says unkindly. ‘That guy kissed you at the bar.’

Oh. ‘That was just Zayn, he’s an old friend.’

‘I don’t care who he is!’

‘What the fuck is your attitude about? You don’t own me. You’re not my boyfriend, Harry.’

‘Oh, believe me I know. It’s all I ever hear about. I mean, God forbid anyone actually develops feelings for you Niall.’

‘Are you fucking kidding me? You’re the one who has some other guy waiting for you at the end of this. You’re the one that’s already spoken for. You just expect to sit around twiddling my fucking thumbs while you’re with him?’ 

Harry looks like he almost wants to cry but Niall’s too angry to apologise right now. If he should even bloody have to. 

‘Have you slept with that guy?’ Harry asks in a much smaller voice than the one he was just using. 

‘What’s it to you?’ 

‘You’re the only person I’m sleeping with at the moment Niall,’ he says, voice raising again. ‘Despite what you think I’m doing while I’m with him. It’s only you, so I have a right to know who I’m sharing you with.’

Niall sighs. ‘Yes, I’ve slept with him in the past.’ 

Harry nods. 

‘But for the record, right now you’re not sharing me with anyone.’ 

‘Promise?’ Harry whispers. 

‘Promise,’ Niall replies, reaching out to Harry’s arm. ‘Now, come here.’

They kiss slowly, right there on the pavement, neither one of them making the first move to pull away. Forgiven. 

**

For their next get-together, Niall suggests going out to dinner to make up for the fuck up that was their last trip out together. 

He spends most of the day in his flat, losing track of the time and when he hears the buzzer go he has to rush around in a panic to clean up the last of his painting equipment before Harry sees something Niall isn’t ready to show him yet. Throughout the past two weeks, Niall has had to realise that the only thing he deems worth painting at the moment, is Harry. Once he’d accepted it, the inspiration came out left, right and centre and he’s now eight pieces down. He’s just not sure how he’s going to explain it to Harry when the time comes. 

When Niall opens the door to him, he sees him laden down with bags. 

‘What’s this?’ Niall asks him. 

‘I thought, I’d cook you dinner,’ Harry tells him grinning while Niall takes one of the bags helping him inside. 

‘I told you I’d take you out to dinner.’

‘I know, but I thought this would be nicer. I wanted to thank you for—you know everything recently.’

‘You sure this isn’t just your way of saying you don’t want to be seen in public with me?’ Niall asks, raising an eyebrow. 

‘No, but it is my way of saying that I don’t want to waste any time being out and about when we could be in bed.’

‘What have I created in you? You’re insatiable,’ Niall rolls his eyes and Harry grins, closing the gap between them and kissing him hard. 

‘Have at it then,’ Niall motions to the kitchen. 

A few of Niall’s stray brushes are still littering the table and they catch Harry’s eye. 

‘Have you been painting this afternoon?’ Harry asks conversationally but Niall’s palms start to sweat. Like maybe he’s been caught. 

‘A little.’

‘When are you going to let me see some of the stuff you’re working on?’ 

‘At some point,’ Niall answers non-committedly.

Harry hums in response. 

‘I actually have a solo show coming up soon,’ he tells him, heart beating. 

‘Yeah?’ Harry replies brightening up. ‘Are you gonna let me see stuff then?’ 

‘Maybe,’ Niall replies in a squeak. Suddenly regretting telling him. Shit. He’ll probably definitely have to show Harry his paintings before the show considering Harry is the subject of all but one of them. Okay, all of them. It’s just that, despite the potential weirdness of it all, he’s actually really proud of what’s come of this sudden burst of inspiration. 

Once they’ve finished their dinner they move to the couch with a beer each and sit at either end with their legs entangled. 

Harry gives Niall a pensive look that makes him squirm a little and let out a nervous chuckle. ‘What?’

‘You have no pictures in your flat.’

‘So?’

‘You’re an artist and you have not one picture on your walls. You don’t even have any photos.’

‘Don’t really take photos.’

‘Not even with friends or—family?’ He asks with a nonchalance that Niall can see right through. He’s snooping. 

‘Nope.’

‘What are your family like?’ Harry goes straight in, apparently abandoning the not-so-subtle nosiness. 

‘They’re fine, normal—whatever. Mum’s a bit of a nightmare, brother’s a prick, dad’s great, like I told you before.’

‘Have you never got on with your brother?’ 

‘Not since I came out,’ Niall answers stiffly. 

Harry hums thoughtfully. ‘And your mum?’

‘She’s not—she’s not as bad. Or at least, she’s not on the same level. She just kinda ignores it, ignores me most of the time. Greg has the life she wanted for both of us, wife and baby. I think most of the time she just pretends that I’ll have that at some point as well. On a bad day, she’ll even ask if I’ve been seeing any special girls recently,’ he lets out a small bitter chuckle at that. ‘But that’s as bad as she gets. Greg, he’s said some pretty abusive things in his time. He’s not been as bad recently, but I’m pretty sure that’s just for his wife’s benefit and he still thinks everything that he’s stopped saying.’

Niall realises he’s been avoiding Harry’s eyes while absentmindedly peeling the label off his beer bottle. 

He looks up to a pitying gaze from Harry. 

‘Don’t—don’t look at me with those big sad eyes, I’m fine.’ 

‘I don’t like to think of you like that. Growing up in a house without—without acceptance. You know, for who you are.’

‘I turned out fine didn’t I?’

‘If you say so.’ 

Niall doesn’t want to ask what Harry means by that, he’s had enough of talking about sad little thirteen-year-old Niall. 

‘Anyway, new subject.’

Harry pauses for a second. ‘Can I ask you a question?’

Niall thinks he might refuse the change in subject and force him to open up some more. ‘Go on then.’

‘You know, my arse...’

That wasn’t exactly the new topic he was expecting but he’s not complaining. ‘Yes, Harry, I’ve become very well acquainted with your arse.’

‘Was it like—how you expected it to be?’ 

‘Um, they pretty much all look the same, mate. More or less.’

‘So there’s nothing about it, that’s like weird or unusual?’ 

‘No, it seemed perfectly normal,’ Niall laughs. ‘But you know, I can give it another inspection if you’d like,’ he smirks playfully. 

Harry rolls his eyes. 

‘Dude, I don’t know what you’re trying to get at here but you have nothing to worry about, your arse is perfect.’

‘So you’re not put off by anything…?’

‘By what?’ Niall asks confused.

‘The hair,’ he mumbles avoiding Niall’s gaze. 

‘Ah, so that’s what this is all about.’

‘So?’

‘So what?’ 

‘Is it gross?’ 

‘No, it’s not gross.’

‘Is it unusual though? Do most guys wax?’

‘Yeah, a lot of guys do but I’m not really into it. I mean I never really have. Do you think my arse is gross?’

‘No. I think your arse is lovely,’ Harry grins. 

‘Well there you are then.’

‘But that’s you. What would other guys expect?’

‘You mean, what will this Nick guy expect?’

‘Yeah. He might prefer me to wax before we—you know.’

‘He, or anyone else, should feel privileged you let him anywhere near your arse in the first place,’ Niall jokes, but he means it seriously. ‘I know, I do.’

‘I guess you’re right.’

‘It’s your body, do what you want, but I like you just the way you are,’ Niall tells him. ‘In fact, I’d quite like you the way you are right now. All this talk of your arse is turning me on.’

**

Not long after, for the purpose of backing up his previous comments, Niall opens up Harry with his tongue. Licking into his arse for so long that Harry’s practically sobbing underneath him, squirming and writhing, begging for Niall to be inside him. 

He tests Harry with a couple of slicked fingers, but it doesn’t take long with him already so lax from Niall’s tongue. 

‘Do you want to try it on your back this time?’ Niall asks, tapping Harry’s side motioning for him to turn over. 

Harry goes over easily, nodding and looking at Niall through glazed eyes. 

Niall rolls on the condom as he looks at Harry deliciously spread open and ready for him. He usually wouldn’t opt for being the one doing the fucking but this, sliding into Harry, he can’t think of anything better. 

He delights in making Harry gasp and whine, angling so that he hits his prostrate on every thrust until he knows Harry can’t take much more. 

‘Niall,’ he gasps. ‘Please…please.’

‘What do you need, baby?’ 

‘Touch me…please..I—I don’t think I can come just from this…please.’

Niall, satisfied with Harry’s begs, wraps his hand around Harry’s cock, which is all he needs before spurting up all over his stomach and it doesn’t take long for Niall to follow.

‘Okay, okay gorgeous, I’ve got you,’ Niall murmurs kissing Harry on the chin and holding him tight while Harry shivers through the aftershocks of his orgasm. 

‘Fuck, you’re perfect,’ Niall whispers, cringing slightly at his own words. He’s not allowed to say things like that, that’s not what this arrangement is about. But Harry doesn’t seem to care as he purrs underneath Niall in response to the compliment. 

**

They lie together in comfortable silence for a while as Niall strokes his fingers down Harry’s back until Niall’s loud ringtone interrupts them. 

‘For fuck’s sake,’ Niall grumbles as he leans over and answers his phone. ‘Hello?...oh hi dad’

Harry sits up, his interest peaked. 

‘Yeah, I’ll be there…. 6 is fine….see you then. Bye.’

Niall hangs up, letting out the breath he didn’t realise he was holding, and resting back against the headboard. 

‘What was that about?’ 

‘Next weekend. It’s my dad’s birthday, he’s having a thing at the house. I have to go back.’

Niall opens his eyes staring at the ceiling. He’s dreading it. 

‘Do you want me to go with you?’ 

Niall’s head shoots to look at Harry. 

‘What?’

‘I can go with you, if you’d like. You know, for moral support?’

Niall blinks at him. 

‘I mean, if you think it’ll cause problems then…’

‘No,’ Niall replies quickly. ‘I mean yes, yes come with me.’

‘Really?’

‘Yeah, fuck it. I mean if you’re okay with them thinking we’re together.’

‘Are you okay with that?’

‘I don’t care what they think. Never have. And my dad’ll like you.’

Harry grins and kisses him. 

**

‘Bonjour,’ Niamh sings as she barges in through Niall’s door the following afternoon. 

He’s in the kitchen doing some washing up. ‘Niamh, I gave you a key for emergencies,’ he tells her disapprovingly. 

She beams at him, unaffected and kisses him on the cheek. 

‘I could have been doing anything,’ Niall continues. 

‘Hm, like banging Harry Styles?’

Niall rolls his eyes. 

‘Yeah,’ she grins. ‘You didn’t think you were getting away with not talking about it did you? You were parading him around at the gig, he was all over you.’

‘I wasn’t parading him around.’

‘What’s going on there? I didn’t even know he was gay.’

‘Neither did he,’ Niall tells her tongue in cheek. ‘He’s bi anyway.’

‘I have to tell you, I would not have put you and him together. How’d you score that?’ she says as she wanders around his flat snooping. She’s so nosey. 

‘Um…thanks,’ he replies looking insulted. 

‘You know what I mean. You’re so different from one another,’ she retorts offhandedly. 

‘We’re not that different,’ he says, rather put out.

He’s about to start defending himself further when she cuts him off. ‘Oh my God. Niall!!’ 

Niall’s eyes dart back over to where she’s standing at his art tables holding one of the paintings he did last week. 

‘You’ve been painting naughty pictures of your boyfriend,’ she holds up the most recent one and he flushes. 

‘That’s—it’s not...’ He sighs. ‘He’s not my boyfriend. And they’re not naughty.’ Well they kind of are, Harry is obviously naked in that one but there’s nothing x-rated on display. It leaves a lot to the imagination. Of course, Niall hasn’t had to imagine anything. 

‘Has he seen these?’

‘Niamh, stop rooting,’ he scolds. 

She just looks at him pointedly and he sighs. 

‘No, he hasn’t,’ he admits to her. ‘I’m not sure how to tell him.’

‘Ah babe,’ she replies, her eyes softening. ‘He’d love them.’ 

‘You think?’

‘Yeah! Niall, he photographs models and artists, day in day out. You don’t think he’d appreciate these for every bit of what they are? They’re incredible.’

‘Thanks.’

He feels slightly better about the whole thing now. For once, he finds himself glad that Niamh insists on forcing herself into every nook and cranny of his life. 

He clears his throat. ‘Can I talk to you about something?’

‘Always.’

‘I’m—I’m taking Harry home with me this weekend.’

‘You’re taking him to meet the family?!?!’ She exclaims. ‘”Not your boyfriend” my arse.’

‘It’s not like that. He’s just coming for moral support.’

‘Well, whatever’s going on between the two of you, I’m sure they’ll love him,’ she tells him smiling. ‘He’s not exactly difficult to like.’

‘Yeah. But it’s my mother we’re talking about here.’

‘You can’t live in fear of her disapproval your entire life, Niall.’

‘I don’t live in fear of it,’ he retorts sharply. 

‘Okay. You can’t live in a constant state of bitterness over it, then,’ she eyes him. 

He just sighs in response. 

‘Look, whether Harry’s your boyfriend or not, you’re taking a guy home for the first time in your life. Make the most of it. It could do you and your family, the world of good if you’d let it.’

She’s probably right. She usually is. Niall decides to ride the wave and hope the waters stay calm. 

**

Harry drives them out to Niall’s family’s house and Niall directs him the whole way. He’s glad to have the distraction of concentrating on the route so that he doesn’t spend the entire journey overthinking and anxious. 

Still, as the roads get more familiar his heart starts beating and his palms sweat. God, he hates going home these days. But, for the sake of his dad, he’s grit his teeth and deal with it. He’s thankful he’ll have Harry there for support this time though. Maybe his mum would look at the two of them together and see how great Harry is and realise it wouldn’t be so bad after all having her son with a man. Even if it wouldn’t be Harry in the long run – seeing as he’s in love with Mr Cool Fashionista. 

As they pull into the drive, Niall takes his seat belt off but makes no effort to move until Harry places his palm on his thigh and gives him a small reassuring smile. 

‘Right, let’s get this over with then,’ Niall opens the car door. 

Harry grabs his hand as they walk up the drive and grips it so tightly it’s almost painful.

They ring the doorbell and Niall breathes a sigh of relief when it’s his father who answers. 

‘Niall!’ His father smiles warmly and he feels some of the tension leave his body and they greet each other with a hug. ‘Thanks for coming son.’

‘Happy birthday, Dad.’

There’s an expectant pause. 

‘This is Harry.’

‘Lovely to meet you Sir,’ Harry politely extends his hand. 

‘Fantastic to meet you, young man,’ his dad grins. Clearly ecstatic Niall has brought someone home for the first time in his life. Niall’s hit with a sudden wave of guilt. He hates that his father has been punished just because he and his mother can’t see eye to eye. 

‘Come in and join everyone. Would you both like a beer?’

They both nod and follow him into the kitchen. Niall’s nerves start to make a reappearance and Harry must sense it as he slides his hand back into his. 

‘Love, Niall’s here,’ his dad announces as they all enter the kitchen. 

Niall takes a deep breath as he and his mother lock eyes. Luckily Harry jumps in straight away in an effort to avoid any avoidable tension. 

‘Hi, it’s nice to meet you, I’m Harry. Niall’s boyfriend,’ he puts his hand out and Niall watches his mother take it, only slightly warily to her credit. 

Harry nods stiffly at her as he takes back his hand. 

‘It’s nice to meet you too,’ she says, a beat too late. ‘And it’s lovely to see you, Niall.’ 

‘Yeah, hi mum,’ Niall replies and clears his throat. 

His dad comes back with the beers. 

‘Thank you,’ Harry smiles at Bobby. His body language much kinder when looking at his father as opposed to his mother. 

‘So, Harry. I wish I could say I’ve heard a lot about you but I’m afraid we haven’t. Niall’s been keeping you hidden away from us,’ his father tuts good naturedly at Niall. 

‘We haven’t been together very long,’ Harry tells him, slipping his arm around Niall’s waist. 

Niall takes a sip of his beer, desperately avoiding his mother’s gaze. 

The party soon starts to get busier and Niall takes to hiding with Harry in the kitchen. He so wishes he could enjoy coming home and seeing his old family and friends. He wishes he could show off Harry proudly to them and introduce Harry to his old life and where he grew up. But he feels just as much of a guest in this house as Harry is. 

When it gets time to eat, they begrudgingly leave the kitchen and join the main party area. Niall walks into the room, Harry following closely behind him, and sees his brother instantly. And the world continues turning on his axis. Who knew? 

They help themselves to food from the buffet and find two chairs before it fills up and they have to try and eat standing up. 

‘Would you like another beer?’ his dad asks Harry. 

‘No, thank you. I’m driving.’

‘Oh, are you not staying the night with Niall?’ 

Niall stares down at his food, cringing. He doesn’t want to see the look on his mother’s face at the prospect on Niall having a boy in his bed under her roof. 

‘Oh…well, I have somewhere to be in the morning,’ Harry says thankfully. 

‘You can drive home early in the morning then, before Niall and I go and play golf’ his dad says trying to persuade him. ‘It’s not as if we’re in outer Mongolia.’ 

‘We may as well be for all he visits,’ Niall hears his mother mutter under his breath and his head shoots up. 

Harry doesn’t reply this time and Niall looks at him. 

‘What do you think, babe?’ Harry asks and he cringes at the pet name in front of his family. 

‘Yeah, if you want. Doesn’t matter to me,’ he says awkwardly. ‘I’ll have another beer dad thanks.’

‘So, how did you meet my little brother, Harry?’ Greg injects himself into the conversation loudly, throwing himself down on a chair opposite. It’s the first thing Niall’s heard him say all day. 

‘Harry works at the place Niamh interns,’ Niall explains before Harry can say anything. ‘We met through her.’

‘Oh, what do you do?’ his mother asks Harry. 

‘I work in fashion.’

‘Well, how cliché,’ Greg sniggers under his breath.

‘What did you say?’ Niall hears himself say. 

Greg’s eyes light up at the prospect of Niall taking the bait. ‘I said, it’s just cliché for someone like him to work in fashion.’

‘Someone like him? You mean, someone like me?’ 

‘Okay, boys—‘ his dad starts his efforts to diffuse the situation. 

‘No, da, I can’t believe after this all this time, he’s still pulling the same shit over and over again and you just let him get away with it,’ Niall all but shouts at his father. Then turns his attention back to Greg. ‘Gay. Someone like me. The word you’re looking is gay. Of course, the walls of this house probably haven’t heard that word so often, have they Ma?’ 

‘Niall,’ she says sternly. ‘You will not come back here and do this again.’

‘Me do this again?’ he laughs bitterly. Incredulous. 

‘Love—‘ his father starts again, placing his hand on his wife’s arm.

‘You’ve been intent on making our lives hell for the past 8 years and I cannot—‘

'Think it's the other way around,' Harry mutters under his breath.

'Excuse me?' Niall's mother asks him. 

'Harry, leave it,' Niall tries to stop him. 

'Niall is one of the smartest, funniest, most kind and wonderful people I've ever met. And if you choose to not to see that because you're determined to punish him for who he is then that's your loss.'

Harry seems to have lost his breath a little while delivering his little speech. No one says anything in return before Harry pushes his chair backwards and it screeches against the floor before he darts out of the room. 

All eyes are on Niall before he springs into action and runs after him. 

'Harry,' he shouts following him outside all the way to the bottom of the garden. 

'Fuck, I'm sorry,' Harry says as soon as Niall reaches him. 'I didn't mean to lay into her like that. Or cause any problems for you.'

'Hey, it's okay,' Niall shrugs. 'There have been far worse arguments in this house and there'll be many more.'

'Still, it wasn't my place and I'm sorry.'

'Don't be. Was kinda nice, having someone on my side.'

‘Well, I’ll be on your side whenever you need me.'

Niall smiles and pulls Harry into him. 

'You can leave now if you want, we don't have to stay the night.'

'I think I’m probably over the limit now,' Harry replies regretfully. 'Sorry, it probably won't take me long to sober up.' 

'Nah, it's fine. I was just thinking of you. I don't mind staying over.'

'You sure?'

'Yeah, it'll give us a chance to live out some of my teenage fantasies,' Niall chuckles. 

'What do you mean?'

'Do you know many times I lay in that room upstairs wishing I had a guy like you in bed with me?'

Harry grins at him. 'Okay, tonight we make all your dirty teenage wishes come true.'

'I'll warn you. Some of them were pretty filthy.'

'I'm sure I'll be up for the challenge,' Harry smirks and winks at him as a shiver runs down his spine. 

**

Once Harry calms down they make their way back into the house and Niall grabs them two more beers so they can escape to their own corner of the room while still pretending to be moderately sociable. 

The party starts winding down around them and Harry heads rests on Niall's shoulder. 

'You tired, gorgeous?' 

'I'm still up for fulfilling a few of your teenage fantasies if you are?' 

Niall grins and his heart races as a delicious feeling washes over him. 

They make their way up to Niall's old bedroom and as soon as the door's closed, Harry pushes Niall down onto the bed and crawls over him. 

‘How long is it since you had sex in this bed?’ Harry asks and Niall barks out a laugh. 

‘In this bed? Never, mate.’ 

‘Glad I could be your first for something,’ Harry giggles which quite frankly should be illegal for someone as sexy as him. ‘I fully intend on making this the best you’ve ever had. Let’s call it my end of semester presentation.’

Niall rolls his eyes but his nerve-endings start to buzz as he watches Harry drizzle lube over his fingers like it’s second nature to him now. 

Harry keeps him on his back while he fingers him open and he allows himself to get lost in the feeling of Harry rubbing against the spot inside him that he’s gotten to know pretty well over the past few weeks. 

‘Mmm, Harry….please,’ Niall gasps. ‘I need your dick.’

‘You need it?’ Harry teases. 

‘Shut up.’

‘Say it again.’

‘Fuck you, you’re supposed to be being nice to me.’

‘I didn’t say that,’ Harry retorts. ‘I said, I’ll make it the best you’ve ever had and I fully intend on keeping that promise. Now say it again.’

‘Please…I need your dick inside me…now.’

Harry says nothing in reply and Niall wants to scream in frustration until he suddenly feels Harry fill him up in one quick movement. 

‘FUCK.’

‘You feel so good,’ Harry groans. 

It’s so good that Niall can’t respond with anything other than incoherence. 

‘Harder,’ Niall whines.

As best Harry tries it’s not quite enough but Harry’s learnt to read Niall’s body perfectly and before Niall has to say anything Harry pulls out and quickly flips him over and pulls him up onto all four before pushing back in quickly making him groan out in a mixture of ecstasy and surprise. 

‘Oh….fuck, Harry…yes…just like that.’ And it’s so good. It’s so fucking good. It’s perfect. Harry’s so deep inside him that he can feel it in every corner of his body. 

Niall can tell Harry is close as his thrusts become uninhibited and messy. They finally fall off the ledge together, Niall screaming in silence while Harry groans deliciously in his ear. 

They collapse in a heap together before Harry pulls out carefully and pulls Niall into his arms. They both know they’ll regret not cleaning each other up in the morning but right now, Niall just wants to fall asleep wrapped up in Harry.

**

Niall wakes up first in the morning with Harry still sleeping soundly next to him. He wonders if this’ll be the last time they get to do this. He knows he’s on borrowed time and it’s only so long before Niall loses him completely. 

He hadn’t really been keen to stay over last night but now he’s glad they did. This room, the whole atmosphere of the place was different with Harry by his side. He’d loved the way Harry had defended him last night, in a way no one ever had before and he’d really loved Harry fucking him in this bed until every lonely, horny ghost of his teenage-self had been laid to rest. 

Niall debates waking him up but decides to let him sleep and gently extricates himself out of bed and wanders downstairs. 

‘Morning, lad.’ His father seems to be the only one up which makes Niall relax a little. ‘I’ve just made a pot of coffee, you interested?’ 

‘Morning, yeah that’d be great thanks,’ he pulls out chair. 

‘It’s good to see you here,’ his dad says as he hands him a mug. 

‘Even when it creates upset and drama every time I come within a mile of the place?’ Niall asks. 

‘We’d rather see you with drama than not at all.’ 

‘Mum’s never gonna be okay with it is she?’ 

‘Of course she is. She loves you very much.’

‘That doesn’t really answer my question.’

‘She just doesn’t understand it and you being so far away and not talking to her about it, which I know isn’t your fault. But it doesn’t help things. Maybe, when she gets to know Harry better and gets used to the idea of the two of you together.’ 

Niall doesn’t have the heart to tell him he’ll probably never seen Harry here again. 

‘I like him, you know. You seem good together.’

‘Thanks, da.’ Niall clears his throat. ‘I better go and see if he’s awake.’ 

‘There’s a full irish on the way if you’re both interested.’

‘Great, thanks.’

He’s just stirring as Niall goes to check on him. 

‘Morning,’ Niall smiles as he throws himself on the bed next to him. 

‘Did I oversleep?’ Harry croaks with remnants of his slumber in his voice. 

‘Nah, I haven’t been up long. You hungry? Dad’s doing a fry up.’

‘Sounds good.’

‘Good,’ Niall says studying Harry’s face. 

‘What?’ Harry smiles.

‘I like you being here,’ Niall mumbles. 

Harry smiles back lazily.

Niall kisses him, chastely at first, until it becomes heated and greedy, their tongues sliding together. 

‘I thought we were going down for a fry up,’ Harry breathes as Niall’s kisses down to the hollow of his throat. 

‘It’ll wait.’ 

**

‘It was really lovely to meet you, Harry,’ Niall’s dad tells Harry, as he’s leaving. ‘You must come again with Niall soon.’

Niall watches Harry smile tightly, knowing he probably feels like a fraud. He’ll likely never be here again. 

‘It was lovely to meet you too Mr Horan.’

‘None of that, it’s Bobby,’ he says shaking Harry’s hand again. ‘Okay, I’ll let you two say your goodbyes. I won’t keep him from you for long,’ Bobby jokes patting Niall on the shoulder before he goes back into the house. Niall’s staying for a little longer to fit in a round of golf with his dad.

'Thanks for last night,' Niall says lowly in Harry's ear as they share a hug goodbye. 

'What about this morning?' Harry asks with twinkling eyes. 

'That too. But last night was incredible. Everything I ever wanted and more.' 

'When will I see you next?' 

Niall swallows an unpleasant lump in his throat. 'Don't you think you've completed your training course yet?' He tries to make a joke. 

Harry frowns. 'I don't want last night to be our last. What about Tuesday?'

Niall sighs. He's only so strong and he finds himself agreeing. 'Okay, see you Tuesday.'

Harry rewards him with a dazzling smile and pulls him in for a kiss. They're so obviously standing in the drive of the house. Anyone in the house may see or the neighbours. And it makes Niall pull Harry tighter for a few seconds and slip his tongue into his mouth. 

'Okay, gorgeous. Off you go.' 

'See you Tuesday.' 

**

Tuesday evening comes around and Niall answers the door with a smile. 

‘You look happy,’ Harry greets him. 

‘I sold a painting today,’ Niall grins. ‘So I got us a bottle of that red wine you like so much and you can choose what takeaway we get and I’m paying.’

‘Congratulations! Which one?’ 

‘Oh, it was one from a gallery that I did ages ago.’ 

‘So, not one from the collection you’ll be displaying at your show?’ 

Niall pauses and tries to keep his voice normal. ‘No. Not that one. I don’t think many of those will sell. That’s gonna be more of an exhibition…type…thing.’

‘Oh? Of what?’ 

‘You’ll see,’ Niall clears his throat. ‘Pick your takeaway.’

Harry rolls his eyes at Niall’s secrecy and grabs the selection of menus off him. 

‘How was the rest of your time at home?’ Harry asks Niall once they’ve ordered and well into the bottle of wine. 

‘It was alright. Not happy families by any stretch of the imagination but there were no more fights. Enjoyed golf with my dad.’ 

‘Good.’

‘Shall we open another one?’ 

‘Sure, sounds good.’ 

‘You alright?’ Niall asks over his shoulder as he goes to grab another bottle. ‘You’re being kind of quiet.’

‘Nick and I are going away together next weekend,’ Harry says to Niall’s back and he freezes, not turning around or wanting to look at him as he hears this. He wishes he wasn’t so spineless. 

‘I mean, there’s a group of us going but Nick and I…. we’re getting a room and I just feel like it’s gonna be…’

‘Right, yeah,’ Niall stops him, not wanting any more explanation. ‘So, this is it then.’

‘I guess so,’ Harry replies quietly. 

‘And you feel good about it?’ 

‘Yeah I mean, I think so. Do you think I’m ready?’

‘After your performance last weekend. I don’t think there’s anything else that I can teach you,’ Niall winks trying to keep it light. 

Harry smiles. 

‘But, mate, don’t do anything you don’t want to do, yeah?’ Niall says more seriously. 

‘Yeah, of course.’

‘You don’t sound very sure.’

‘It’s not that I don’t feel okay about it. It’s just—I’m fine with you and it’s relaxed and I’m confident with it. But that’s just you,’ Harry swallows. ‘What if—with him it’s different?’

‘It won’t be like starting again. I mean, yeah everyone is different but it’s like when you first fucked a girl. It’s like riding a bike. Just a different bike.’ 

‘What about me and you?’ 

Niall swallows. ‘What about us?’

‘Will we still see each other?’ Harry asks timidly. ‘I mean, will we stay friends?

‘Yeah, course. If you want.’

‘I do,’ Harry smiles. 

‘I’m gonna miss this though,’ Niall admits. ‘Being with you.’

‘Me too.’

Niall puts his glass down and leans over until his lips meet Harry’s. It starts off tender until they’re running out of breath, groaning into each other’s mouths and getting handsy. 

‘What do you say. One for the road?’ Niall suggests and Harry grins. 

They don’t have any takeout in the end. Instead, they spend their last night together wrapped up in bed. Niall knows they’re clinging onto each other more fiercely than ever before, his ankles locked behind Harry’s back as his arms lock him in pushing into Niall harder and faster. 

They come one after the other and collapse together as Niall runs his hands over every inch of Harry’s sweaty skin making him sigh happily. Niall wants to memorise what it’s like to have Harry curled up in his arms, in post-sex bliss, so specifically that he’ll never be in danger of forgetting what it’s like. 

‘That was the best sex of my entire life,’ Harry mutters as he opens his eyes dopily. 

‘Me too,’ Niall replies. So why does he feel so deflated and empty. 

**

Niall’s glad of the distraction when Niamh shows up at his flat a few days later. He’s done nothing but work and paint, and none of his shifts have overlapped with Niamh anyway, plus his painting just makes him think about Harry which he’s trying to avoid. He misses him, and he didn’t think he would. He knew he’d miss the sex, but even that, he didn’t think he’d miss it like this. He’d always thought having sex with the same person over and over would get tedious and uninteresting but it had added a dimension of sex he wasn’t used to. Plus there was the added benefit of knowing Harry wasn’t expecting anything and they could just relax and enjoy each other. 

‘Harry not here?’ Niamh asks. 

‘No, he’s not always here.’

‘It seems like it.’

‘Why are you here?’

‘I came to take you out for dinner.’

‘Why?’

‘Because, you’re my best friend, and I love you and I’m worried about you.’

Niall sighs. He has this conversation with her at least once a month. ‘I’m fine.’

‘There’s no food in your kitchen at all. You’re skin and bone, have you even eaten anything today yet?’

He hasn’t. When he’s totally immersed in getting ready for a show, he often forgets to eat. 

‘Thought not, we’re going out.’

‘Niamh, I have to paint. You know I’m working an 8 hour shift tomorrow so I need to do as much today as possible.’

‘You need a break, babe. Come on.’

He finds himself agreeing, he can’t be bothered to fight her any longer. Plus, he is actually quite hungry now that he’s thinking about it. 

‘Okay, let me just go get cleaned up.’

‘Fine, I’ll be here noseying through your art as usual,’ she replies.

‘Have you told Harry that you’re putting naked pictures of him on display for all the world to see yet?’ he hears her call from the living room. 

‘It’s not all the world.’

‘That’s a no then.’

‘I’ll tell him eventually.’

**

Later, at the restaurant, Niamh orders for Niall the most calorific dishes on the menu to fatten him up. He lets her, knowing it makes her happy. 

‘So where is Harry this weekend?’ she asks. 

‘He’s away with friends,’ he informs her, and then he can’t stop himself. ‘What do you know about that Nick guy?’

‘Grimshaw?’

‘Yeah. He was at your birthday. Do you know him well?’

‘Not really well but I see him from time to time. He’s really cool. Why do you ask?’

‘Nothing, just Harry talks about him that’s all.’

‘Ah, a little jealous are we?’ she grins. ‘I wouldn’t worry.’

‘I’m not worried,’ Niall scoffs. He has no right to be anyway. 

She just grins wider. ‘You’re cute when you’re in love.’

‘I’m not in love, don’t be stupid. It’s just casual.’ 

‘Hey, don’t snap at me. I think he loves you back, you know.’

Niall almost tells her everything. That Harry is currently spending the weekend in bed with another man, but he chickens out. Doesn’t want to burst her bubble. And maybe his own. 

** 

Monday evening, Niall gets a call and his mood instantly lifts as he read Harry’s name on the screen. 

‘Hey, gorgeous,’ Niall answers on automatic before wincing. Probably shouldn’t call him that anymore. 

‘Hey,’ Harry breathes. ‘Can I come round?’

‘Yeah, course. How was your weekend?’ 

‘It was okay. I’ll be there soon.’

He waits for him in uncomfortable nervousness. On the one hand he can’t wait to see him and on the other he’s filled with dread. What’s that all about?

Although, as he opens the door and sees Harry’s perfect face, all the feelings of dread leave him. 

‘You look tired,’ Harry says after they say their hellos. 

‘Yeah I am. I’ve been working a lot and painting when I’m not working.’

‘Oh yeah? Working on stuff for your show?’ 

‘Yup.’

‘Did you do anything else over the weekend?’ 

‘Went for dinner with Niamh. Other than that, been pretty much living like a hermit. Anyway how was your weekend?’ He knows he has to ask but he has no desire to hear about any of it.

‘It was great. A really good time.’

‘Great, I’m glad,’ he says clearing his throat. ‘Do you want a beer?’

‘Yeah, sure thanks. We didn’t have sex.’

Wait. Niall spins around. ‘You didn’t have sex with him?’

‘Nope.’

‘All weekend?’

‘Nope.’

‘Why not?’

‘It just didn’t feel like the right time. We kissed, we fooled around a little but I didn’t feel like going further so I didn’t.’

The relief hits Niall like a train. Holy shit. Maybe Niamh was right. He’s flooded with alarming recognition. 

He almost laughs out loud he’s so relieved. 

‘But, it’ll happen eventually I guess.’ 

And, crash back into the real world again. 

‘Oh, so you’re not like—rethinking him then?’ 

‘No, I mean it’s not that I’m not attracted to him. We’ll have sex eventually.’ Niall wants to scream at how unfair this is. He’s finally realised how he feels and he’s too late. 

‘Right, ‘course,’ Niall agrees hastily trying to seem breezy. 

‘I mean, unless there’s a reason you think I shouldn’t be with him?’ Harry asks. 

What does that mean? ‘Like what?’ Niall’s confused. 

Harry studies him for a moment. ‘Nothing. Never mind,’ he clears his throat. 

‘Well, I really should get back to painting,’ Niall says. 

‘Oh. I thought we were going to have something to eat,’ he looks disappointed. Niall feels guilty but he his mind is reeling from his sudden realisation and he wants to be alone to mull over his feelings. 

‘Sorry. Some other time yeah?’ 

‘Yeah, yeah okay,’ Harry replies quietly. 

The air’s thick in his apartment after Harry leaves. He needs a beer. Or seven. 

**

Niall spends the next week throwing himself into his art and avoiding texts from Harry. He knows exactly why he’d been steering clear of this whole love shit, and it wasn’t for the same reasons he’d originally thought. 

And normally when he’s having a shit time of it, he’ll let himself get lost in his painting, away from it but considering all he’s painting is Harry, he can’t even use that as a distraction. He’s never been so miserable in his life. 

After successfully managing to avoid Harry for two weeks, his streak ends when there’s a knock at his door and he opens it to find him with an unhappy face. 

‘Hey,’ Niall breathes. 

‘Hi,’ Harry replies glumly. 

‘Are you okay?’ Niall asks, letting him in. 

‘You’ve not been answering my calls or my texts.’

‘I know, I just needed—‘

‘You promised we’d stay friends.’

‘I know, it’s just been work and getting ready for the show.’

‘Convenient excuses.’ 

‘Harry, I’m sorry I just—‘

‘I’ve been having a shit time and I wanted you and needed you,’ Harry’s eyes are wide and hurt staring into Niall’s.

Niall wants to ask why he didn’t want or need Nick but he can tell Harry’s genuinely upset. ‘Why? What’s happened?’

‘My grandma died last week and I had to fly back to England for the funeral and work weren’t happy and they’ve cut me out of three shoots as punishment. Big boss called me into his office and basically bollocked me, lecturing me on how grandparents’ funerals apparently aren’t important enough. Parents and siblings’ funerals are important, maybe a cousin but grandparents don’t make the cut,’ Harry laughs bitterly then looks down as tears pool in his eyes. 

‘Harry, I’m so sorry. I should have answered your calls,’ Niall wants to smack his head against the wall. How could he have been so selfishly wrapped up in his own problems while the man he’s in love with was in pain and he needed him.

‘Yeah, you should,’ Harry sniffs. 

‘Well, I’m here now. What do you need?’

‘Can I just stay here with you? I don’t want to be alone.’

‘Yeah, course. Whatever you want.’

Harry goes straight into Niall’s room and gets under the covers. It’s only 8:30 but he doesn’t look like he’s slept in days so Niall just lets him get into bed while he tidies up his art. 

**

Niall wakes the following morning to the sound of Harry shuffling about the room. 

‘Hey,’ Niall whispers sitting up. ‘You okay?’

‘Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you. Go back to sleep.’ 

‘Come back to bed, it’s early.’

‘I’ve got work. Can’t be late and give them another excuse to discipline me.’

‘Fuck them,’ Niall says snuggling back into the pillow and Harry laughs. Niall hadn’t realised how much he misses that sound. 

‘Can I come back tonight? I don’t want to be alone.’

‘Yeah, sure,’ Niall says. Again he wants to ask why he’s not asking Nick for this. Why he’s not leaning on Nick for support but he knows it’s not the time. 

‘See you tonight,’ Harry whispers and Niall feels the bed dip and then Harry’s lips on his cheek. 

Later in the day as Niall’s finishing some touches on his most recent piece he thinks about doing something nice for Harry when he gets in from work and ends up walking to Sainsbury’s to get them both some food. He knows Harry’s favourite is a roast and he wants to cheer him up. 

Niall’s barely cooked a day in his life. He can do a mean stir fry and that’s about it. He finds himself struggling already only twenty minutes in and decides to call Niamh for help. No answer, damn. He calls his dad next, his dad’s a great cook, he’ll know what to do. 

‘Hello?’ his mother answers. 

‘Oh hi, is dad there?’ 

‘No, he’s out, do you want me to tell him to call you later?’ 

‘Actually, it’s something I need to know now. But I guess you might be able to help me.’

‘Okay,’ she answers slowly. 

‘How do I make roast potatoes? The really good crispy ones that you always do.’

‘You’re cooking?’ 

‘Yes, I’m making dinner for Harry,’ he tells her. 

‘Sounds romantic,’ she says, not unkindly. 

‘Um…not really. He’s been sad. His grandmother died last week and he’s not having a great time at work.’

‘Oh, I’m sorry to hear that. Give him my best wishes.’

‘I will,’ Niall replies. This is the most civilised conversation they’ve had in years. 

‘Okay, well. For good roast potatoes, you’ll have to start off by boiling them for about 20 minutes…’

Harry arrives back just in perfect time for dinner. 

‘Wow, something smells incredible,’ Harry says as Niall lets him in. 

‘I cooked you dinner,’ Niall admits. He feels almost shy about it. He wants to Harry to enjoy it. 

‘This looks amazing. You didn’t have to do this.’

‘I wanted to cheer you up,’ Niall tells him quietly. 

‘Thank you,’ Harry whispers and leans into kiss him on the corner of his mouth. His heart lurches in his chest. 

‘If it’s shit, we’ll throw it away and order pizza.’

‘It’s not going to be shit.’ 

It’s actually very much not shit. They both eat until they can’t move and Niall feels very proud of himself. 

**

The next few days follows the same patterns. Harry stays at Niall’s, Harry goes to work every day, Niall works some of those days and others he paints and they sleep next to each other every night. Platonically, of course.

Harry’s becoming more like his normal self but Niall is still apprehensive to bring up the Nick issue so they continue to dance around it. 

Tonight, they find themselves at a bar and Niall’s starting to wish he hadn’t agreed to coming out. Being around Harry constantly without being able to touch him is bad enough when they’re in his flat doing mundane boring stuff but now 4 beers down and Harry is looking especially good in a sheer black shirt with the buttons not fastened past the top of his ribcage, it’s all Niall can do not to climb into his lap. 

Maybe he should find some random at this bar and go home with them. Get Harry out of his system once and for all. 

He doesn’t have to ponder over that thought for very long as a very attractive guy throws himself down beside Niall in their booth as soon as Harry nips to the toilet. 

‘That your boyfriend?’ The guy asks upfront. 

‘Nope,’ Niall replies. 

‘Sweet,’ the guy grins. ‘Can I get you another drink?’ 

‘No, he’s fine thanks,’ Niall’s gaze snaps up from staring at this guy’s inviting mouth to see Harry behind him. 

‘You’re in my seat,’ Harry tells the guy bluntly when neither he or Niall reply. 

‘Sorry, dude he said he was free to play,’ he guys holds up his hands in surrender and gets up to leave Niall. 

Harry sits back down and Niall stares at him incredulous. 

‘What was that?’ 

Harry doesn’t say anything, just meets Niall’s gaze calmly and leans in to kiss him. The side of his mouth meets Niall’s coaxingly. 

‘Harry…stop,’ Niall pulls away but Harry’s quick to re-close the gap. 

This time he leans in and kisses Niall firmly and properly, tongue immediately begging for entrance. 

‘Harry, please…give me a break.’

‘I want you,’ he whispers and somethings snaps in Niall. 

‘Harry, stop it,’ he shouts. Of course, it doesn’t seem like a shout with a music so loud in the bar. ‘I’m trying to be your friend here, like you asked. You’ve told me you’re committed to someone else and I’ve been trying to respect it.’

‘Please Niall, I want this.’

‘No, you don’t. Maybe right now you do, but you’ll regret this, you know you will,’ Niall tries to keep his voice even. ‘And frankly if you’re doing this just because you’re threatened by that guy, I could not be less interested.’ 

‘It’s not about him. It’s about me and you.’

Harry kisses him again and this time Niall can’t find the strength to pull away. He’s weak for him, and they both know it. 

‘Please, take me home,’ Harry whimpers into his mouth and Niall knows he’s not strong enough to say no. 

They’re all tongues and hands in the cab on the way back Niall’s flat. Harry barely leaves Niall alone long enough to pay the driver. 

They fall through the door and make their way to the bed in a twist of limbs as Harry tries desperately to remove Niall’s clothes without removing his lips from his. 

‘Fuck, I missed this,’ Niall lets himself admit as Harry kisses down his chest once he’s managed to get his shirt off. 

He opens Harry up until he’s dragging moan after moan out of him and then pushes into him in one quick movement. 

He presses down tight on top of him so they’re chest to chest and his lips are at Harry’s neck. 

‘That good?’ Niall whispers. 

Harry nods vigorously, his top front teeth pressed firmly into his bottom lip. 

Niall starts to fuck up into him more forcefully and Harry groans loudly. Niall’s neighbours must hate him. He’s never been short of enthusiastic male visitors but he’s never been with anyone quite as loud as Harry.

‘I hated seeing that guy with you tonight,’ Harry admits gasping. 

Niall’s surprised Harry chooses this moment to tell him that. He lifts his head up to kiss him and mutters into his mouth. ‘There’s only you, gorgeous. Only you.’

**

Niall wakes up the next morning, legs tangled with Harry’s and a delicious ache in his bones. He grins when he replays the events of last night over in his head. There hadn’t been a glimmer of hesitation from Harry. He had to have wanted it just as much as Niall did. 

He looks over at Harry still sleeping soundly next to him, he’s so fucking beautiful. He’s never met a guy before that he’d describe as beautiful but there’s no other word that does Harry justice. He can’t resist dotting some kisses on Harry’s exposed upper back before slipping out of bed to make some coffee. 

He feels almost giddy as he pads into the kitchen. He decides he’ll make Harry breakfast, before persuading him to stay in bed with him for the rest of the day. 

As he flicks on the kettle he hears a phone buzz on the counter beside him. He sees it’s Harry’s as the screen lights up. He can’t tear his eyes away once he sees the text come in is from Nick. 

\- I love you too x -

That’s all it says. Too. He loves him too. Meaning the text he was answering had been from Harry telling Nick he loved him. 

Fuck. How could he have been so stupid. Harry has probably been texting him this whole time he’s been staying with Niall. Nick was always the one Harry really wanted from the very beginning, hell it’s the only reason they started this whole thing in the first place. Why should anything be any different now. He should have stood his ground last night, should have told Harry no until he got the message loud and clear and he definitely should have gone with home with the attractive seat stealer. But really what difference would it have made. He’d still be in same boat, they’d just have had sex one time less. 

‘Morning,’ he jumps when he hears the croak behind him. 

He turns around to see a naked Harry grinning lazily in the doorway to the kitchen. 

‘Morning,’ Niall clears his throat. ‘The kettle’s just boiled, I’m gonna get a shower.’

He can’t sit around casually chit chatting with Harry. Not now. 

‘So, what did you fancy doing today?’ Harry asks a little later while Niall gets dressed. 

‘Actually, mate do you mind if you give me some time alone today. I’d really like to get some painting done and I can’t get much done with you around,’ Niall tries to say absentmindedly with his back to him. It’s not a lie. Harry is very distracting and he needs to get a few more pieces done before the show. Not to mention, Harry still doesn’t know he’s the subject of his work. 

‘Mmm good distraction though,’ he feels Harry creep up behind him and winds his arms around his waist. 

He quickly extricates himself from Harry’s hold. ‘Mate, seriously.’

‘Oh, okay,’ Harry mutters quietly, looking down and Niall feels guilty. Then he remembers that Harry has been telling another man he loves him and makes sure Harry leaves quickly. 

**  
Five days later and Niall’s back to his old tricks of avoiding Harry’s calls and texts. He even manages to be at work every time Harry stops by. 

That is until today when he hears the familiar tap at the door. 

‘Hi,’ Niall breathes when he sees him. He’s pissed at him but the sight of him still makes him a little dizzy. 

‘You’re doing it again,’ Harry says agitated.

‘What’s that?’ 

‘Avoiding me,’ he answers matter of fact. ‘But the thing is, I can’t work out why. Last time I got it. You thought I was with Nick, you assumed I wanted space. I get that. But this time. I don’t understand? We spent that night together. I thought you wanted I want. I thought we were on the same page.’

‘What you want?’ Niall’s already out of his depth with this conversation. Like he is with so many of the conversations he and Harry have. 

‘But I guess I misread the situation,’ Harry blinks slowly and lets out a breath. ‘So, we can just go back to being fuck buddies if that’s what you want.’ 

What the fuck is he talking about?

‘I mean, if that’s why you’ve gone cold again, because I came on too strong the other night then we’ll just go back to being casual.’

Niall’s head is spinning. ‘You want to be fuck buddies?’ is all he can say is response. 

‘No, not really. I mean, I wanted more. But if fuck buddies is all you can give me right now then I’ll take it.’

‘All I can give you?’ Niall can’t believe what he’s hearing. ‘But, you’re in love with Nick?’ 

‘No I’m not,’ Harry has the nerve to look shocked that Niall would even suggest that. 

‘But…? What? I—you—I saw the text.’

‘What text?’ 

‘From the morning after that night. You got a text from Nick that morning saying I love you too. That was only five days ago Harry so—‘

‘That wasn’t—It wasn’t what you think. I wasn’t telling him I’m in love with him.’

‘No?’ Niall’s not sure what he believes. 

‘No. I was telling him I’m in love with you.’

Niall’s stomach drops to the floor. ‘That makes absolutely no sense.’ 

‘Well, I didn’t just decide to tell him that then,’ Harry sighs. ‘When things didn’t work out between Nick and I during that weekend away, I thought it was just a bad day and it didn’t mean anything. But the next time we got together it was the same, my heart wasn’t really in it and I just ended up telling him everything. About you, and about our arrangement and it was clear to him that it was you I have feelings for. I think I already knew it but talking it out with Nick just made me realise properly.’

Niall’s heart is beating so fast he can barely take in what Harry’s saying. 

‘In the text you think you’re referring to. I was telling Nick that I’d finally grown a pair and made it clear what I want from you,’ he explains. ‘Apparently, I didn’t make it very clear after all.’ 

Niall can’t find any words. 

‘Look, here read the text for yourself if you want,’ Harry pulls his phone out and makes a few taps before he passes it to Niall to read. 

\- Finally told Niall what I want.  
Thanks for being so great. Sorry  
things didn’t work out.  
Love you x -

Niall can’t quite believe what he’s reading but it’s there right in front of him in black and white. 

‘I—um…I don’t want to be fuck buddies, Harry.’ 

‘Oh…’ Harry’s body visibly deflates after his heartfelt speech and Niall immediately wants to rephrase what he just said. 

‘No! I don’t mean…’ Niall tries to get the words right. ‘I love you too Harry. So much.’ 

Before he can see his face for a reaction, Harry launches himself at Niall, immediately kissing him all over his face. 

‘Harry,’ Niall moans pretending to have to wind knocked out of him but they both end up laughing. 

‘You really love me?’ Harry asks. 

‘I really do.’

** 

‘But the show doesn’t start for another 45 minutes why do you need to be here so early. I thought everything was already ready,’ Harry witters on behind Niall as he pulls him along the pavement on the walk from the car to the gallery, his fingers entwined tightly between Harry's. 

‘It is,’ Niall tells him. ‘But I need to show you something before everyone else gets here.’

They get to the door of the venue and Niall’s hand pauses at the handle. 

‘You ready?’ 

Harry stamps his foot impatiently and rolls his eyes. ‘This is your show. Shouldn’t I be asking you that question? What’s this all about?’

Harry sighs. ‘Yes, I’m ready.’

Niall grins and takes in a deep breath before opening the door and motioning for Harry to go in first. He walks in and looks around. He notices the first painting and his eyes widen with recognition. Niall watches his face and it starts to dart around taking in more and more lining the walls. There’s 22 pieces in total. All of him. 

‘But they’re all of me?’ Harry says quietly looking around in awe. 

‘I didn’t know how to tell you. So... surprise?’ 

Harry takes a few more tentative steps forward looking around again. Niall’s nervous now. Oh God does he hate them? He probably thinks he’s some obsessed creep. He’s going to lose his boyfriend before they’ve even been together six weeks. 

‘Say something.’

‘I can’t believe you did this all for me?’

Niall chuckles. ‘Well, I didn’t exactly do it for you. Just my hands seemed to know I was in love with you before my mind did and you were the only bloody thing I could paint since the day I met you.’

Harry laughs, looking like he may be on the verge of tears. 

‘So, you like them?

‘Like them? I love them.’ He grins. ‘And I love you.’

He pulls Niall into his arms and they kiss tenderly for a few moments. 

‘But…’

‘What?’

‘I can’t believe you didn’t let me pose for you.’


End file.
